tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85205399274433552282024-03-14T10:51:41.066-07:00Principal DaysStories from my days as an educator in middle and high school...Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.comBlogger112125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-80910411682084526782023-06-09T15:54:00.001-07:002023-06-09T16:09:23.265-07:00Graduation Speech - 2023 - Union Middle School<br /><br /> Below is my graduation speech for the Union Middle School class of 2023.<br /> <br />Like last year, I didn't write the below speech until a week before the ceremony. When I was finally ready, I sat down at my laptop and tried to figure out what I wanted to say, what I wanted to share. Once I had the gist of the theme, it took just over an hour to write everything down. It flowed pretty quickly. Add in some edits (as well as a kind reviewing eye by Mrs. Dunavan, one of our 7th grade ELA teachers) and it was complete. <br /><br /><br />What's interesting (for me, at least) about this speech is that I practiced it way less than any other speech that I had. At the actual ceremony, I needed my notes less than I had in any previous ceremony. I just felt a flow to my words and what I wanted to collectively share about this promotion class.<br /><br /><br />When I did practice reciting the speech, I got through it just fine without any emotion or hiccups. However, when I read the speech in front of everyone, I couldn't get out the words for #5. Didn't expect that to happen. Powered through it. Just didn't expect the ability to speak to leave me at that moment. <br /><br /><br />As I share in my speech, this was a really good class. What I liked most about this class is that every single day, I could meet an 8th grade student who I had never interacted with before and just be amazed by their spirit, their humor, their classwork, everything. We are going to miss this class.<br /><br /><br />As always, thank you parents for your support over the past three years, thank you staff for your continued dedication to our students, and thank you students for just being you.<br /><br /><br />Here is the graduation speech. Enjoy.<br /><div><br /><br />-Todd</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><br /><br />Good Morning Everyone,<br /><br /><br />For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Todd Feinberg, and I have been privileged to have been the principal of Union Middle School for the past eleven years. It is an honor to stand in front of you all today and means a great deal to me. I truly care about each and every one of my Union Tigers. I hope you all will keep in touch.<br /><br /><br />Wow. What. A. Year. <br /><br /><br />In fact, what a crazy three years we have all had. Online for 6th grade. Transitioning back for 7th. Then this year. 8th grade. <br /><br /><br />What. A. Year.<br /><br /><i><br />And What. A. Class.</i><br /><br /><br />This class is a group of talented leaders, exceptional scholars, and most importantly a group of kind, wonderful, reflective, and often silly human beings. You’ve made us laugh. You’ve made us think. You’ve made us begin to miss you before you’ve even left. And we are going to miss you as you transition to high school, wherever that might be. Congratulations on your impending promotion. You should be very proud of yourselves for this accomplishment.<br /><br /><br />No Union Middle School promotion would be complete without some final words of advice. Now, some of you who may have been frequent visitors to our front office over the past three years may recognize some of what I’m going to say. I’m going to ask you to indulge me for one final time, even if you’ve heard all of this before. To be brief, I’ll focus on five key thoughts.<br /><br /><br /><b>One</b>: Your days are made of moments and are but a small part of your journey. It’s great to make good choices to help guide your way, just don’t be afraid to make mistakes. I’d also like to encourage you to be different. Middle school students spend three years trying not to stand out and not to be singled out. My advice as you enter high school is to embrace your differences and make it who you are. After all, there is only one you. It’s sort of your superpower, you being yourself. Embrace it. <b>Be Different</b>.<br /><br /><br /><b>Two</b>: I’d like to encourage you to work every day on being just a little more resilient. You’re going to be told no from a parent sometimes. It’s possible you won’t get the lead part in the school play. There’s always a chance you might not get into your first choice for college. All of these things are okay. Challenges build resilience and resilience builds character and character builds you into the person you need to be. Don’t assume there’s just one path to get you to where you want to be… because there isn’t. I can guarantee you that being a middle school principal is a much different destination than being a placekicker for an NFL team. Plans change. Be okay with that. <b>Be</b> <b>Resilient</b>. <br /><br /><br /><b>Three</b>: Assume positivity in your conversations with both friends and strangers. Many of those you meet are carrying mountains. Be someone who helps them climb them instead. Don’t forget to treat others as you want to be treated. I realize that’s something you’ve heard before, but as you get older, it continues to be increasingly valid. Try to have conversations in person rather than on a digital device. Have “<i>facetime</i>” actually mean in-person “<i>face to face</i>” time. Texting often makes things worse, not better. I’ve yet to see one argument end well through texts. Schedule real in person time with your friends, with your family. If you think about all of your favorite memories, how many of them happened in person versus how many of them happened online. <b>Be Kind </b>and <b>Be Present</b>.<br /><br /><br /><b>Four</b>: Choose your friends wisely. Your circle of friends influences your daily decisions which, in turn, shape you into the person you will become. Surround yourself with people who have the qualities you want to one day have. Be open to making new friends along the way. As you grow, so should your friend circle. Adding new friends along your high school and life journey is a good goal to have. Your future best friend that you never knew you would one day have could be sitting across from you in your 9th grade math class. Simply put, <b>Be a Friend.</b><br /><br /><br /><b>Five is a bit longer. </b><br /><br /><br />The past three hundred sixty five days have been quite challenging for me, healthwise. The first health scare was a year ago, almost to the day.<br /><br /><br />Remembering that day, I recall sitting in the ER with my father. He’s asking questions of me, of the doctor. I’m non-responsive with an extremely high fever and severe chills. All I can recall about the doctor is that they were strongly concerned about whatever was happening to me. I’ll later be told that I had sepsis; this is essentially when bad bacteria finds its way in your bloodstream. And as bad as that sounds, it’s actually quite worse.<br /><br /><br />It was touch and go for the first day or two. It’s amazing what you think about when you’re faced with these life-threatening moments.<br /><br /><br />Me, I thought of many things, my friends, my family… oddly I thought a lot about Union Middle School, both the staff and our students. I thought about missing this promotion ceremony. I thought about my daughters, my wife, and my fantasy football team (and not necessarily in that order).<br /><br /><br />But what I thought about most were my sons. They had just turned 7 and I thought of all of the things I might miss. I thought about all of the times I said no to one of their requests to spend some time together. Maybe I had work to do, maybe I wasn’t in the best of moods, maybe I didn’t want to go PokémonGo hunting for the 50th time that week. Whatever the reason, all I could think about in that hospital bed were all of the moments my sons and I never had (or will have) together and how badly I wished I had said yes. <br /><br /><br />So my final bit to say to you on the final day of your middle school career comes from what I thought could have been my own personal final day… and that final bit of advice is to <b>say yes. </b><br /><br /><br />Say yes to staying out a bit later than maybe you should (but still within your curfew, of course). Say yes to a semester abroad. Say yes to homecoming with a friend. Say yes to your tomorrow by starting today. Say yes to when your father asks if you want to go to the mall together. Say yes to lifting the spirits of a friend who seems a bit down lately. Say yes eight years from now to writing a kind card about your impending college graduation to a former middle school teacher who made a difference. Say yes to trying out for the high school field hockey team, even if you’ve never played before. Say yes to taking a calculated risk. Say yes to pushing yourself a bit outside your comfort zone. Say yes to starting a high school club that speaks to you. <br /><br /><br /><b>Say yes to being different.<br /><br />Say yes to being resilient.<br /><br />Say yes to being kind and being present.<br /><br />Say yes to being a good friend.</b><br /><br /><br />I’ll even recommend you <b>say yes to PokémonGo</b> with your children one day in the far, far future, even if it’s for the 50th time that week.<br /><br /><br />So, to the Union Middle School class of 2023, we wish you the very best. I thank you for being a part of my life over the past three years and thank you for being a part of each other’s journey. You have each brought something very unique and special to Union Middle School. Without a doubt, and I don’t say this at every promotion but, this is a class that we will miss. And miss a lot.<br /><br /><br />Congratulations, Class of 2023.<br /><br /><br />And now, the presentation of the diplomas for the Union Middle School class of 2023.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiqh10YWQGoB1a4h8hXmwsiMS2HXP0YJZbcYVYdt8IxkkNR66ilk3lepnwzEsGR40j1aJ5CnAr-PeVGL0TNPjxsp6mqWk_Gy5-jjRkst4cRxgkjWJugRk9S6zMkCFY8D6kFfinw7bk-9peiO4umsaC5qUhhgoC6lyJQ0vo9BjX9Qw4lUqx3_J6X-HFD" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="990" data-original-width="1284" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiqh10YWQGoB1a4h8hXmwsiMS2HXP0YJZbcYVYdt8IxkkNR66ilk3lepnwzEsGR40j1aJ5CnAr-PeVGL0TNPjxsp6mqWk_Gy5-jjRkst4cRxgkjWJugRk9S6zMkCFY8D6kFfinw7bk-9peiO4umsaC5qUhhgoC6lyJQ0vo9BjX9Qw4lUqx3_J6X-HFD" width="311" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;">(Thank you to Mrs. Wu for the photo!)</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>—---------<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-40442017215423323222022-06-03T13:03:00.001-07:002022-06-03T13:03:20.114-07:00Graduation Speech - 2022 - Union Middle SchoolBelow is my graduation speech for the Union Middle School class of 2022.<div> <br />I put off writing the actual "principal promotion" speech until a week or so before the actual ceremony. I knew the main concept as I had been collecting inspirational and thought-provoking quotes for the last few years. I also had an idea to weave in the concept of middle school seemingly going so fast, seeing how quick the time has gone over the past decade as UMS principal. Hard to believe it's been ten years. <br /><br /><br />I really liked this year's promoting class. Yes, there were a bit more silly and slightly more time-consuming than some of the previous classes, but I don't know if we've ever had just such a good natured group of kids who could look back and just laugh at some of their mistakes. I don't know if there's every been a class who has matured as much in a single school year as this year's 8th grade students. We are all going to miss them.<br /><br /><br />As always, thank you parents for your support over the past three years, thank you staff for your continued dedication to our students, and thank you students for just being you. <br /><br /><br />Here is the graduation speech. Enjoy.<br /><br /><br /><br />-Todd</div><div><br /></div><div><br />Good Morning Everyone,<br /><br />For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Todd Feinberg, and I have been privileged to have been the principal of Union Middle School for the past ten years. It is an honor to stand in front of you all today and means a great deal to me. I truly care about each and every one of my Union Tigers. I hope you all will keep in touch.<br /><br />I’ve written nine promotion speeches. This, if you’re following along, will be my tenth. Ten years; that is a long time. Ten years ago, none of our promoting students had even started kindergarten yet. Also ten years ago, my wife and I just had <i>one</i> set of twins. Ten years is a long time. <br /><br />Someday, Union Middle School class of 2022, you’ll reflect back and wonder where all of the time went. Your children will be attending school and have a spirit day where students dress up like it’s 2022. They’ll wear yoga pants and sport a weird shaved-on-the-side-with-curls-on-top hairstyle. You’ll be worried about your parents, stressed out by the decisions of your children, longingly miss the ability to take a nap on a Saturday afternoon, and, as I’m sure your parents in the crowd can attest, you’ll need a vacation just to recover from the family trip. And yet, all of this will happen in a blink of an eye.<br /><br />Knowing how fast these days will feel, I’d like to share a few words of advice. Over the past decade, I’ve collected a variety of quotes, some of which I’ve come across in the oddest of places and said by a variety of individuals. Of those I’ve found, I’d like to share five of these quotes with you. What better time to do so than here, at your middle school promotion. I’m hoping that these workds speak to you, just as they’ve spoken to me.<br /><br /><b>From Maya Angelou: “We do the best we can until we know better. Then, we do better” <br /></b><br />As you move through high school and beyond, please remember that your mistakes are forgivable. Don’t beat yourself up for your youth. We all have so much to learn. No one knows everything there is to know. Figure out how to forgive yourself, especially in those moments where you truly tried your best. And afterwards, once you know better, simply do better next time. There will always be a next time.<br /><b><br />From Kyle Higgins, the writer of the comic book Darkhawk 4: “If you’re so worried about who you’re supposed to be, it’s real tough to appreciate who you are.”</b><br /><br />One thing that is common about our early teenage years is how hard we try to not stand out, especially at middle school. Perhaps we’re unsure of ourselves, worried that we might become the center of whatever conversation is being said at the lunch table across campus. I’ve found that middle school students are often afraid to branch out from their relatively small social circle. Know that you aren’t alone when you feel a little bit lost on who you were supposed to be. My advice is this, Class of 2022: Know that you are loved, as evidenced by everyone who came to see your promotion today. Try to celebrate the littlest of victories, each one counts. Worry less about who you are supposed to be and appreciate who you are, because you are anything but invisible.<br /><br /><b>The third quote is: “What do you think about having more children?”</b><br /><br />This was said by my wife two years ago. We have just recently returned to on-speaking terms. Moving on here.<br /><br /><b>Here’s one of my favorite quotes I’ve ever heard: “Some of you need to stop listening to criticism from people you wouldn’t ask advice from.”</b><br /><br />This quote came from Phil Brooks, a professional wrestler better known as CM Punk. With the increase of social media in our lives and the ability for anyone to anonymously troll another individual on the internet, one skill that many of us have lost, assuming we ever had it in the first place, was the ability to deal with the noise. Not the noise that a passing train creates but instead the noise that others bring into our lives by their hateful, mean, spiteful comments, often online. Please know that the negative words you may encounter say more about the person writing them than they may about you. Don’t give their words any oxygen. After all, why care about any criticism from those people you wouldn’t ask advice from? Trust who you are and don’t listen to the noise. Be you. That’s who you are meant to be. <br /><br /><b>And lastly, from educator Kylene Beers: “The right thing at the wrong time is the wrong thing”</b><br /><br />For the past few years, I’ve reflected on this quote more than a couple of times. I know the year of distance learning was hard on our Union Middle families, just as it was for the UMS staff, and just how hard it was for me. We collectively missed out on spirit games, field days, the UMS blasts, and so much more. I truly wish that your middle school experience could have been different. But, throughout the pandemic, I kept on coming back to this quote: the right thing at the wrong time is the wrong thing. <br /><br />There are going to be moments in your life where the right opportunity comes along, but you know it’s the wrong time. Perhaps it’s a possible love interest while you’re involved with someone else. Perhaps it’s a trip around the world, right before the interview for the job you’ve always wanted. Perhaps it’s as simple as participating in an all-hours Elden Ring tournament the night before your ELA belt test. Don’t beat yourself up, thinking your moment has passed. There is always another trip, another tournament, another opportunity tomorrow.<br /><br />There might even be times where you need to make what might be an unpopular and even disappointing decision. These will be challenging moments because you know what the right thing might be. When the timing is right, you’ll know. Trust your instincts and your heart. When the timing isn’t right, for whatever reason that may be, it truly isn’t the right thing to do anymore; it’s the wrong thing. <br /><br />And the right thing to do now, and yes, I do think it’s the right time as well, is to wish you, the class of 2022 the very best. I thank you for being a part of my life over the past three years and thank you for being a part of each other’s journey. You have each brought something very unique and special to Union Middle School. You will be missed but I look forward to what happens next and what quotes you create along the way, for the next ten years and beyond. It goes fast. Savor these days.<br /><br />Congratulations, Class of 2022.<br /></div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEqoQAss_I0c-N4L1tA-1ywJhVXZnjYvoafcIuRkcQaSYWH7d4I3VnAyPi3k1Bu66c4xaefi6hXiCN2x32tX9p-GrkC5LPgwLJohprNtjXSjgTXUpsCC81nAgWttV_MKfCKawFsdHZuOmxZEVTVjbOJHkbUSV8SRNS9H3pBmJdwZN69af06JqSYeyP/s600/image0%20(1).jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="531" height="528" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEqoQAss_I0c-N4L1tA-1ywJhVXZnjYvoafcIuRkcQaSYWH7d4I3VnAyPi3k1Bu66c4xaefi6hXiCN2x32tX9p-GrkC5LPgwLJohprNtjXSjgTXUpsCC81nAgWttV_MKfCKawFsdHZuOmxZEVTVjbOJHkbUSV8SRNS9H3pBmJdwZN69af06JqSYeyP/w467-h528/image0%20(1).jpeg" width="467" /></a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieG6OxGUG682ZHn6KAlFFteXLEG0Q19GMd4Vb0JECO0-4p7MO5CADAS-H1i0fjpIFJSBgTHxA9xYKOL1PvTgI9-biGtjSh8lcDGd2aMNtj7uSe9pchJ_ULeB_I9VVd8HFj87ryseF3Qlwp4EXYS_vEcmbqnmVU4vJ7rp0ai3ltdIjlOBw72FnRQZ9L/s600/image1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="450" height="511" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieG6OxGUG682ZHn6KAlFFteXLEG0Q19GMd4Vb0JECO0-4p7MO5CADAS-H1i0fjpIFJSBgTHxA9xYKOL1PvTgI9-biGtjSh8lcDGd2aMNtj7uSe9pchJ_ULeB_I9VVd8HFj87ryseF3Qlwp4EXYS_vEcmbqnmVU4vJ7rp0ai3ltdIjlOBw72FnRQZ9L/w383-h511/image1.jpeg" width="383" /></a></div><br /></div><br /><div><br /></div>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-461425995420368162021-09-03T16:33:00.006-07:002021-09-03T16:33:41.165-07:00No, I'm Not Okay<p>When I start writing a blog, I often write key bullet points of what I want to say. From there, I simply add in my thoughts to flesh out the story. This blog started in October of 2020. Thirty minutes ago, it was just bullet points. It's taken a bit of time to heal from how I (and how many of you) felt last October. I'm guessing we aren't completely there yet. But that's okay.</p><p>---------------</p><p>October 26, 2020</p><p>I'm sick of the pandemic. I'm tired of working from home, from the screams of my children frustrated with their zoom classrooms, and from having seemingly zero purpose. I miss being at school with our staff and students. I don't think this is sustainable but while I'm sick <b>of </b>the pandemic, I don't want to get sick <b>from </b>the pandemic. And that's the dilemma. </p><p>For most of the pandemic thus far, we've had all four of our children at home. All four children have special needs, although each in very different ways. Let me be blunt about online schooling: while it doesn't work for a lot of students, it really <b>really </b>doesn't work for a lot of students with special needs. </p><p>There are some good point coming out of the last six months of the pandemic. My sons can now work the TV remote better than my wife or I can at this point. All four of our kids have figured out how to access YouTube on their iPad despite not having the app downloaded (hint: they go through Safari - pretty crafty of them). I haven't spent a penny on dry cleaning. I haven't spent a penny on dress shirts for work, although I'll eventually need to replace my entire wardrobe due to my current stationary-type life. My sons and daughter can sing each other to sleep through the hole in the wall they've busted open between their rooms. But for the most part, my days feel really empty. </p><p>My wife is unable to safely go visit her father in San Diego.</p><p>Our daughters' special needs camp, which provides necessary respite for our family, is closed and will be for another 12 months.</p><p>At work, I'm finding myself in a constant bind between how to best support our students, staff, and community, which often begets three different outcomes.</p><p>The level of uneasiness about what the next few weeks and months will bring.</p><p>I have a palpable fear of students wanting to be back at school and then realizing that "new school" is nothing like "old school" - it's just distance learning in a classroom. </p><p>I know that everyone is suffering in different ways right now. We are all feeling a sense of loss. I recognize that a loss of the upcoming spirit game for a 13 year old might feel less important in life's journey than the loss of prom for a 17 year old high school senior to many, but to that 13 year old, it's just as significant if not more. It's hard to compare one's loss to another's. Similar to grief, everyone gets to experience these emotions as they need to. It's what's real to them. </p><p>It's weird. I thought working at home would be less stressful, but it's actually significantly more. I have a true appreciation for my staff in what they're doing to make distance learning successful while still hating the fact we can't magically return to pre-pandemic days. I hate being an online principal. I hate how I sometimes have to raise my voice at home to speak over the constant "kid noise". Most days, it feels like everything is falling apart, whether it's our school, the staff, our families, or even my hamstrings due to a kickball incident over a year ago. Yes, they still hurt.</p><p>I do know that the feeling of loss from not having our 6th grade participate in after school volleyball this year will pass. </p><p>I know that my wife will eventually get to see her dad again.</p><p>I know that my worry over what the next six months will bring, especially as cases skyrocket this winter as many believe they will, should not and cannot paralyze how we remain connected to one another. </p><p>I know I'm sick of the pandemic, but what I'm <b>not </b>is sick from the pandemic. </p><p>Very clearly, I'm not okay... and I'm not going to be okay for a while... but that's okay. A lot of us aren't okay right now. We won't be okay when the quarantines are lifted and we return to some resemblance of our pre-covid lives. It's going to take a while to feel okay again.</p><p>But all of that said, I do know that one day it's going to be okay. We're going to be okay. </p><p><br /></p>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-19395983396182503992020-10-01T18:36:00.005-07:002020-10-01T18:36:49.225-07:00The Classmate Twin Idea and the Chaos Thereafter<p>It was a very odd summer for many school administrators. There were changing guidelines, shifting expectations, and just a whole lot of uncertainty about what school would look like in the fall. At our middle school, while nothing was official until further along in the summer, it was increasingly clear that our school would start in some format of distance learning. Upon this belief, I searched for ideas that might make the loss of in-person school a little less painful for our students and their families.</p><p>One idea I latched onto very early was the idea of a learning pod for our students. One of my early emails to our families used this terminology as something we would explore to best support all students. However, just as quickly as I began to figure out what this process would look like for our school, a huge backlash regarding learning pods surfaced within education. Questions of equality, equity, and whether or not a school should become involved in the process.</p><p>These conversations helped me refine my thinking on what I was truly looking for to best support our students. What I wanted was the opportunity for a student to select a friend to be in their classes. Thus, when they were on their Zooms together, they'd see a friendly face... when they were working on their assignments, they had someone to connect with who they already felt comfortable talking to... what I was searching for was for our students to have <b>a classmate twin</b>.</p><p>And so, that's what we offered our students: name a student who you'd like to share your four core academic classes with and, if they also name you, you'll be partnered together. Sounds simple, right?</p><p>It wasn't.</p><p>Behind the scenes, we were building a master schedule that we had never created before. We were on a time crunch to build student schedules quickly, as a promise I made to myself was to provide students their schedules as early as possible this year. The final schedule format was approved rather late in the summer, sending us scrambling to shove a 6 weeks process down to 6 days. Everything we were doing was to best support our students.</p><p>Nevertheless, we added the wrinkle of the classmate twin. I thought it would be really easy. Students just had to click on a link and fill out a 4 question form. That's it. Nothing more. We even developed a FAQ that answered every student/parent question that we could think of. Regardless, and perhaps this shouldn't have been a surprise, there was a flood of questions and special requests about the classmate twin process.</p><p>Can we be triplets? <i>(no... just twins...)</i></p><p>Do I have to select my sibling? <i>(check with mom and dad first... i'm fine with whomever you select)</i></p><p>Can I be a classmate twin with someone from a different grade? <i>(exactly how would it work for a 7th grade to be a classmate twin with a 6th grader? what am I missing here?)</i></p><p>My student is new to UMS; we don't know anyone; how are we supposed to select a classmate twin? <i>(you're right; it's hard to select a classmate twin when you don't know anyone - but that's ok... you aren't missing out; after all, most years this isn't even an option)</i></p><p>Can you extend the deadline until after school starts? <i>(this doesn't even make any sense... that's not how a master schedule works)</i></p><p>The student my child wants to partner with doesn't want to partner with them. Can you make the classmate twins anyway? <i>(yeah, no, not going to happen)</i></p><p>And so on.... </p><p>I also received a lot of angry emails from parents. They were upset that I had only given them a week to find a classmate twin and only a half dozen notification reminders. They were upset that their child's two best friends had chosen each other and left their student without a classmate twin. They were upset that their student's best friend refused to fill out the form and reciprocate in the process. They were just upset. </p><p>Meanwhile, amidst all of these emails, we had our admin team working around the clock to make the necessary changes to all of the students' schedules who selected a classmate twin. We spent almost the entire weekend working on the classmate twin schedule requests. I personally paid two separate babysitters to watch my own kids on a Saturday afternoon so I had extra time to work on the schedule requests. And this wasn't us leaving the work to the last minute; the opportunity to select a classmate twin was jammed into our get-ready-for-school timeline and we just had to find the time. </p><p>In my mind, I thought the classroom twin process would be just a few clicks per student. I was wrong. I was very, very wrong. After the dozens and dozens of hours we spent checking the spreadsheet, comparing classmate twin schedules, adding classes, dropping classes, checking back to make sure all students had a full schedule... All I could think about was a question a colleague asked: knowing what you know now, would you have introduced the classmate twin idea for this school year?</p><p>Every single time I was asked or reflected on this question, I was able to provide an immediate answer: Absolutely not. Never again. It was a huge mistake and not worth the angry emails or time away from our families. It was just too much to do in such a short amount of time. Nothing could dissuade me from how certain I was that I'd never go through the classmate twin process again. I truly cannot express how labor intensive the process was behind the scenes for our admin team. We just couldn't ever subject ourselves to that kind of commitment with everything else that's going on at the start of the school year.</p><p>And then I got the following unsolicited email in early September, reprinted below with permission and slightly edited to hide the identity of the parent and their family.</p>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<div><div></div></div><br /><i>Dear Mr. Feinberg,</i><div><i><br /></i><div><i>My name is (Parent), I have a (child) in 6th grade and we have been part of the Union School District since (they) started Kindergarten at (elementary school X). <br /><br /><br />Going from K-5 to MIDDLE SCHOOL was a milestone (my child) was looking forward to with much enthusiasm. But as we closed out 5th grade, we knew everything was now "subject to change" and we'd have to wait to see how the beginning of 6th grade was going to happen. <br /><br /><br />Right as summer break started, our family made a conscious decision to pair up with another student (and their family) from (elementary school Y) that we knew through soccer. Expanding our "bubble" with this other family gave both (students) some semblance of "fun" and excitement during summer break, and a chance to escape from being sequestered alone with their parents 24/7. <br /><br /><br />When your email came out announcing the opportunity to request a Class Twin for the academic year, it was like you had read our minds, heard our anxiety around the start of the school year, and offered a solution that felt like it was custom made for us. (Our daughter) and (their friend) were assigned to be Class Twins and have been navigating through the world of Union Middle School together. It not only has been fun for them to share the experience together, it's given the parents a chance to share oversight responsibilities too. The (students) alternate houses during the school week, which gives each set of parents (all 4 working from home) a day or two of fewer distractions and more opportunity to focus on work.<br /><br /><br />I'll take a page from your playbook - <br /><br /><br />TL/DR:<br />THANK YOU for the class twin program and for accommodating (our daughter's) and (their friend's) request. They are going through 6th grade right now together as they alternate between houses during the school week. It's gone a long way to helping all of us get through these unusual times together.<br /><br /><br />I hope you have a great holiday weekend.<br />Sincerely,<br />(Parent)</i></div><div>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</div><div><div></div></div><div><br /></div></div><div>And that email made me think... sometimes, it's a challenge to have the best of intentions and not see the good that comes out of the work we do as educators. A former colleague always said "no good deed goes unpunished" and truthfully, that's how it feels to be an administrator a lot of the time. It's how I felt about the classmate twin process right up until I received this email from the parent. </div><div><br /></div><div>And if you ask me now if I'd offer a classmate twin again if we ever began another year with distance learning, I wouldn't say no. </div><div><br /></div><div>I think I'm a solid maybe, subject to change.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-35621937003489221242020-08-19T20:59:00.034-07:002020-08-19T22:30:08.564-07:00Not The Happiest 6th Grader<p>I was not the happiest 6th grade student. </p><p>My family moved to Atlanta before my 4th grade year. I spent my 4th grade year with Mrs. Scott, joined by most of my friends from my new community that my family had moved into a few months prior. 5th grade was with Mrs. Harms, just down the hall from my 4th grade classroom. Again, somehow all of my friends were grouped together for our 5th grade year. I loved school.</p><p>Near the end of the year, all of my friends and I became increasingly excited to move to the local middle school for our 6th grade year in the fall. It was around this time that my parents sat me down and informed me that I'd be attending private school for 6th grade. I was devastated.</p><p>While some 11 year olds would handle this news with grace, I did not. Instead, I protested, argued, made the empty threats only an 11 year old can make ("Well, then I'll just live somewhere else!"), and spent every day leading up to 6th grade as a relatively unhappy child. My parents, in looking back, have a few choice words to describe my behaviors during this time. Essentially, I was not a very happy 5th grade student.</p><p>And so I entered Westminster not knowing a soul. </p><p>Westminster was at the time (and still is) a high performing K-12 private catholic school. My day started with a 30 minute commute. There were weekly religious church sessions (which was something different for me to sit through). I didn't know anyone. I really didn't make any friends the whole year. </p><p>From my entire year at Westminster, I have four, and only four, distinct memories. </p><p>I remember running in PE twice a week throughout the entire campus. They said the route was approximately 2.2 miles, but I'm pretty sure it was much longer than that. </p><p>I remember playing a lot of foosball and buying candy at break and lunch.</p><p>I remember being pooped on by a bird en route to art class one day. </p><p>And I remember Mr. Gardner.</p><p>Mr. Gardner was my 6th grade science teacher. Science was my least favorite class. It's important to note that I also had a geography class, art class, a music class, the aforementioned running/PE class... and yet, science was still my least favorite. It was in my science class with Mr. Gardner that I acted out the worst. For whatever reason, Mr. Gardner took the brunt of my frustration about switching schools, from being away from my friends, for just being an angry 11 year old child.</p><p>Mr. Gardner did everything a teacher should do. He tried the consequence route. He held parent-student-teacher conferences. He assigned more work. He assigned less work. He graded me a bit harshly. He gave me a lot of grace. Looking back, he tried everything. </p><p>One day, I was being especially challenging in class, and I could tell that Mr. Gardner was equally frustrated with the situation. He stopped his lesson for the class and asked me if I wanted to lead the class since I had so much to say. I told him I'd be glad to teach the class for him. He paused and said calmly that I'd be leading the chapter review lesson the following day for the class and that I best be ready. No problem, I said.</p><p>But there <b>was</b> a problem. I hadn't paid attention for the entire chapter and hadn't started preparing for the test in two days. Now, I was responsible for the chapter review to be delivered in 24 hours. This was not good.</p><p>I went home and immediately read the chapter. I had collected some notes from a classmate. I treated the teacher-provided study guide as the holy grail. I even referenced the encyclopedia set we had at home. By late that evening, I had cobbled together a Jeopardy style review, even with the hidden daily doubles. I felt prepared. </p><p>The class itself was a blur. It's amazing how much faster the class period goes when you're the one in front of the class, leading the lesson. I put my classmates into three teams and they could, within their groups, respond to each of the answers with the correct question for the points shown. At the end, one team was declared the winner and, as a class, we had reviewed everything from the study guide plus some additional information gleaned from the encyclopedias. </p><p>Mr. Gardner sat off to the side for the entire lesson. At the end, he looked over at me and said "well done." I was very exhausted afterwards and fell asleep early that night. I was not prepared for exactly how challenging and tiring leading a class lesson could be. I also earned an "A" on the chapter test the following day; turns out if you prepare the class review, you learn the material for the test quite well. My main takeaway was how much I enjoyed teaching. A seed was planted.</p><p>All of this took place in 1986-87. We moved to California after my 6th grade year and I never looked back at my year at Westminster and Mr. Gardner, even though I credit him with my first teaching experience. I'm not sure I would have ever gone into education without Mr. Gardner taking a chance on letting a knucklehead of a 6th grader lead a chapter review in science class way back when. </p><p>Every so often, I would search online for Mr. Gardner. I only knew his last name and that he worked at Westminster, but I figured it couldn't be that hard... after all, I'm pretty good with my Internet searches. And yet, I had zero luck. </p><p>Until I received a random reply from the dean of students at Westminster. He shared that Mr. Gardner had switched schools a while back and had since retired. He was living in Tennessee and yes, his first name is Warren (but went by Sandy) and he was on Facebook. Off to Facebook I went. A quick message one night was instantly replied to and he provided his email address for me to send a thank you that included my apology for what a challenging student I was for him in 6th grade science.</p><p>He replied to my email and shared his life since Westminster. He also kindly shared that he had no recollection of my Jeopardy game nor of me as a student. I'm not sure how this was possible; I had assumed that the year we spent together had permanently scarred his soul. However, his words provided the "why" and the "how" quite well in his email reply: </p><p><i>"Your story to me, if you'll grant me a religious interpretation, speaks to what many call a 'God moment.' What was for you a seminal event was for me one of a blur of moments (as you know from your own experience being in charge of a class and now a school), but neither you nor I had to appreciate it for what it was at the time. It became something large because of who you are and where IMO God placed you to be influenced in a powerful and life-giving way. I can only imagine how effective that first class was. My daughter, who is now also a teacher, observed recently that kids listen to other kids who step into adult roles better than the adults. And your use of Jeopardy was perfect and outside my box (though it should not have been) and makes recall with more definition the day I turned over a class to a student. I'm sure everyone enjoyed it, including me, and in the process it lit something in you that still burns - yes, a God moment."</i></p><p>While I myself am not a religious person, I appreciated his words and how it best explains that perhaps there was some deliberate destiny involved in my parents' decision to transfer their 6th grade son (against his wishes) into private school back in 1986. </p><p>Perhaps this means that what we endure in the present, even in a year as unbecoming as 2020, does directly spark who we collectively become in our shared future. </p><p>Maybe there's a little bit of hope for us all, especially so for those parents with an unhappy, moody, ever-so-challenging 6th grade student.</p>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com2450 Serra Mall, Stanford, CA 94305, USA37.4274745 -122.1697198.6871775294388556 -157.325969 66.167771470561149 -87.013469tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-83504995983463447852020-06-04T20:04:00.001-07:002020-06-04T20:04:29.183-07:00Graduation Speech - 2020 - Union Middle School<div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">Below is a video of my promotion speech for the Union Middle School class of 2020. </span><br /><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">Last year, I wrote that my promotion speech was hard to write. Well, obviously I wasn't aware for what 2020 would bring. What an odd race to the end of the school year for all of us. </span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">The original plan was to allow the two students who ended up in my promotion speech to give their own speech at the in-person ceremony. It would be an off-shoot of my annual speech and I figured it would be pretty silly, given how these two students just finish each other's sentences. </span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">Then Covid-19 shuttered our schools and then our hopes for an in-person promotion for our students. I told these two students that I wouldn't be able to do what we had talked about for our in-person speech. They were bummed and so was I.</span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">In the following weeks, thanks to one of my former fantasy football friends "zoom-bombing" our annual NFL draft chat, I had an idea: why not have these two students "zoom-bomb" my promotion speech.</span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">I asked them if they were interested. After their screams of excitement, they said "yes" a thousand times. We gathered together via Google Doc a few weeks later and in one sitting, probably no longer than ten minutes, we had gathered our ideas and built the promotion speech. We originally thought we were going to be on the same zoom but I realized how tricky that was going to be. Have you ever tried to coordinate the schedules of two teenagers? It's not pretty.</span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">So we filmed them independently and had the brother of one of our staff members (<a href="https://bradzangwillphotography.zenfolio.com/weddings" target="_blank">Ms. Zangwill's Brother Brad</a>) splice everything together. </span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; vertical-align: baseline;">I don't think any artist is every happy with their final product. Luckily, I'm not an artist and I'm accepting of what you're about to see. It was a different type of speech to a different type of school year. </span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; font-size: 14.85px;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif; font-size: 14.85px;">We are going to miss the class of 2020 because I can share that we already do. You brought a lot of light to our campus each day and I'm hopeful you'll continue to shine wherever you stream your high school years. </span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;">As always, t</span><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;">hank you <i>parents</i> for your support over the past three years, t</span><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;">hank you <i>staff</i> for your continued dedication to our students, a</span><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;">nd thank you <i>students</i> for just being you. </span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;">Here is <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzmPA-IYfUs" target="_blank"><b>the promotion speech video</b></a>. Enjoy.</span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;"><br /></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14.85px; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: georgia, "times new roman", serif;"><br /></span></div>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-27355218075177361592020-05-01T20:40:00.001-07:002020-06-04T21:59:45.776-07:00Everything is going to be okI've always heard that no one is ever given more than they can handle. Whatever your internal max tolerance in these chaotic times might be, you should be able to make it through. This week, however, was one of the books.<br />
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We are on week 902 of the covid-19 pandemic. Actually, it has only been about seven weeks, but if you told me it had been nine hundred some odd weeks, I would have believed you. As previously shared, my wife and I have four young children, twins approaching their 5th birthday and another set about to turn ten. The soon-to-be ten year olds have significant special needs to where they have the strength of a twelve year old but the behaviors of a four year old. To say things are the opposite of stable for our household would be accurate.<br />
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Our strategy thus far has been to take it one day at a time. My wife and I have chosen to not judge each other on the amount of television we allow our kids to watch, the amount of wine or diet sodas we drink, and the amount of times either of us feel the need to visit Costco for their daily walk.<br />
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So far, given all of the imbedded challenges we have in our household, we've survived. It hasn't been without our hourly moments of despair, fear, and frustration. We often wonder what else could happen, what else could go wrong, and what else is going to be just too much for us to handle.<br />
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Enter a power outage Wednesday night.<br />
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Around 5 pm, everything electronic suddenly turned off. The iPads our daughters were using. The television our sons were watching. The power bank chargers needing a refill. Our garage door somehow half open, unable to close. Our refrigerator with the dinner we hadn't prepared yet not being able to be opened out of fear everything would instantly spoil. We had promised our children a family movie (after watching Despicable Me 1-3, they were quite excited to watch Minions) that evening; now, there was no way to make it happen. Imagine trying to explain a power outage to your special needs children or to your four year old sons. They weren't as agreeable as I had hoped.<br />
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My wife and I sat there in the dark, after finally putting all of the kids to bed later than we had hoped. Our phones were slowly draining of their current charge and we had no way to refill them. We just sat in the dark, illuminated by our screens, wondering if the power would ever turn back on. And yes, it did. At 2 am. All of the lights. All of the TVs. All turned on at the same time. It was a very nice wake up call. At 2 am.<br />
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But hey we made it through it and survived to another day. Since our social distancing expert slash babysitter was unavailable today, I decided to take all four kids out for a drive in an effort to give my wife some quiet time. We had errands to run plus the kids wanted a milkshake as a special treat. Using the milkshake as the reward for our behavior expectations, the kids did a great job. We went to Costco for gasoline. I got semi-lost trying to find my way from Lawrence Expressway to <a href="https://www.picchetti.com/" target="_blank">Picchetti Winery</a> but made it there eventually. The kids were all doing wonderfully. We were passing the reservoir when Molly, from the back of the car, made a sound. It was one of those sounds that every parent knows and every parent fears. It was the pre-vomit sound.<br />
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Everything slowed down at that moment. You know what's about to happen. You think about snapping your fingers to freeze time. Maybe some Matrix-style maneuvers that teleport the sick child to the side of the road. Anything to prevent what is seconds away from taking place. But you know that nothing will work. You beg. You plead. And then you see the vomit. It's on their clothes. It's on the seatbelt. It's all over the car. Somehow, it got onto another child, who is now screaming that their sibling's barf is in their mouth. The other two kids are loudly complaining about the smell. It might be their first moment with a vehicle vomit situation. Special moment. It's just a complete mess.<br />
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But I looked back at Molly. Her eyes were puffy. She was covered in regurgitated macaroni and cheese with some strawberries mixed in. Tears were falling down her face. Please note that this is the Molly who has become incredibly violent over the years. I have a dozen scratches and bruises made by Molly right now. She often reacts with anger and confusion and screaming. But I looked back at her as I had pulled to the side of the road. She looked right back at me and said in a voice that was intermixed with verbal tears, "I'm sorry, Daddy. I'm sorry, Daddy."<br />
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With her clothes completely soaked, Molly was left in her underwear. I harkened back to my wife's voice as we left for our excursion: are you sure you don't want to bring an extra set of clothes? I had said no. Molly, however, was quite excited as she was allowed to sit in the front seat for the rest of the way home, albeit mostly naked in doing so. The boys seemed to understand that these things happen and they stopped complaining about the smell. Kenna repeatedly told her sister Molly that everything was going to be ok, that she (Kenna) always throws up in the car -and this is true: Kenna is known to vomit about half of the time for any car ride longer than 60 minutes- and that she always gets better after a while.<br />
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So here we are, in the middle of a pandemic, seven weeks into shelter in place with no end in sight, driving to get wine that I'm not even going to drink, with all four kids to give my wife a few moments of well deserved quiet, on the side of the road without cell service, after one of the longest weeks of my life, with an entire car reeking of vomit, my Molly thinking that she did something wrong, and I just took a deep breath and realized: everything is going to be ok.<br />
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We are going to be ok. You are going to be ok. We are going to get through this, whatever "this" happens to be for each individual in the midst of our chaotic times.<br />
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We can handle whatever life throws at us. So you've got a pandemic forcing us to shelter in place with four young children, adding in blackouts and wine-collection road trips filled with vomit explosions? No problem. We can handle it. Everything is going to be ok. Take a few minutes to enjoy the little things in life. Marvel at how your special needs daughter responds with kindness toward her probably food-poisoned sister. Take a moment to relish the special story you can one day share about the blackout ending at 2 am and being awakened by the screaming televisions throughout the house.<br />
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We are in incredibly unique times and we are going to get through this. <b>Everything is going to be ok.</b>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-57618217920113432732020-04-06T14:40:00.000-07:002020-06-04T21:59:51.729-07:00Three Long WeeksIt's been three weeks since our schools shut down.<br />
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<span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Three weeks in my role as a principal since the decision was made to close down and shift toward online learning for our students. </b></span><br />
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I think as a principal that I had a sense that our school campus were going to be closed in the weeks leading up to the actual decision. A lot of our teachers had questions about the "what if" aspects of such a closure and I told them directly that I didn't have the answers. What I did have were some calculated predictions of what <i>could </i>happen if we did close our school campus. Thus, we spent multiple meetings leading up to the campus closures discussing what we <i>might </i>do if our campus closed and had to shift to an online learning model.<br />
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It was in these meetings that my already significant appreciation for my staff increased even further. Every question they asked was about how they could support their students, each other, and our school community. There was genuine concern about our more academically prepared and emotionally fragile students. How were we going to ensure all of our students had lunches, internet, access to the curriculum, access to their counselor, everything. Our staff spent countless hours preparing for the inevitable shift before most middle schools had even had their first conversation about the possibility. I even created a <b><a href="http://bit.ly/UMSFAQonline" target="_blank">FAQ</a> </b>for our parent community to answer common questions that we expected them to have and gave them an opportunity to ask more if need be.<br />
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Even with all of our preparation, it's been a hard three weeks. Educating our students online isn't the same as opening their car doors in the morning as they arrive with school, checking in with them as we pass them on our campus, and waving goodbye as they depart at the end of the day. I'm pleasantly surprised at the student turnout in our classes each day, but it's a continued challenge for our staff to not experience diminishing returns therein.<br />
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I've also discovered I'm not a very good "online" principal. I might become more comfortable with the role as our time away from the school campus continues, but I'm not so sure. Being an "online" principal is a completely different job than what I've spent the last eight years doing at Union Middle. There's a whole lot less face to face interaction, less walking around and connecting with people, less understanding of who's doing what and who needs help. I miss seeing the staff, our parents, and especially our students.<br />
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I miss my normal work day. I really, really miss it.<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: medium;">Three weeks in my role as a parent since my daughters and sons have been unable to attend their own schooling during the day.</span></b><br />
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Last November, my wife and I pulled our daughters out of the local public school after an incident on campus that led to one of my daughter's arms being significantly bruised. It wasn't the only reason we removed them but it was the final straw for our family. We eventually found a non public school for them and have spent the last few months figuring out the odds and ends of making it work. It hasn't been easy, as we were in a limbo of sorts in making it work for our daughters and our family... but things were just about to be settled when the closures hit.<br />
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As shared previously, our daughters have significant special needs. They do much better with set routines and seeing their classmates. While they struggle with transitions, they were beginning to find some stability in their routines with their new school. For them, as special needs students, there is no substitute from in-person support and learning opportunities. It is during these times that our special needs students get overlooked. Even if a school is trying to support them academically, it is rare that an online learning model can truly support a special needs student in need of one to one support. With four kids and me working from home during the day, we just can't provide both of our daughters the one to one support they need.<br />
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They miss going to their new school each day and ask when they can go back. They don't understand why not.<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: medium;">Three weeks in my role as a spouse spending every moment of every single day at home with my wife and our four kids. </span></b><br />
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I've blogged recently about limiting our time together as a family for a variety of issues, one of which is maintaining a level of safety for all four of our kids. However, with the shelter in place, we have no choice but to all be together. So far, there's only been one hospital visit. It was for one of our sons and unrelated to our daughters. He decided to do a <a href="https://media.giphy.com/media/sRe0TGUMzmqNW/giphy.gif" target="_blank">Ric Flair face flop</a> in his bedroom onto a toy truck and split his upper lip open. Of course he decided to do this the night before my school started our online learning schedule. Never a good thing to be in the ER amid a pandemic from 7 pm Sunday to 3 am Monday morning.<br />
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Most of our days have been dividing the kids' locations for our mere survival. Separate sides of the table. Separate sides of the house. Separate walks. Separate everything. We don't even watch a movie as a family; it's just too risky. I can't even take my daughters to Costco. If we try to escape for a few minutes and check Facebook or Reddit, we're flooded with depressing Covid-19 news and often something worse. There's no reprieve, no quarter from our daily lives.<br />
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My wife and I get about two hours of television and talk each night after the kids go to bed. Netflix has helped greatly but we are down to just a few episodes of Ozark left and have already sped through Tiger King. There's no way to get the kids enough exercise during the day to encourage a better sleep. Longer days mean longer nights somehow for our family. My wife and I are just barely hanging on. Each day is a victory of sorts.<br />
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And it's only been three weeks.<br />
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Three. Long. Weeks.<br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-10011201367512499182020-02-11T19:55:00.000-08:002020-06-04T22:00:09.949-07:00Nacho Average Student<br />
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One of the most common topics in my conversations with other school principals is about building school culture. How do you do build a positive school culture? How do you know it's working? What more can I do as a principal to improve it? Is there a point where I have to just give up and look for another job? Is there anything specific you do as a middle school principal to improve school culture?<br />
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You'd be surprised at the number of questions I'll get that always seem to center around school culture. My answer can easily be summarized in three words: <b>hire nice people.</b><br />
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But simply hiring the nicest people sometimes isn't enough. Often, you have to help create moments for your staff and students to connect. This was how our student recognition events were born.<br />
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Prior to my arrival, we held one end of the year student recognition event. It was held during the last week of school. Teachers would often take their favorite student from the current school year. Everyone would sit together for lunch and then quickly depart. The student would be with in the teacher's classroom one or two more days and then most likely depart for good.<br />
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One summer, I suggested to our leadership teacher that we should hold more events during the year. I intentionally wanted to have these new events earlier in the school year in an effort to water the relationship between a student and their teacher. My idea was not met with open arms. This was too big of change for some staff members and despite going ahead with the event, there were some teachers who chose not to attend. Even worse, there were some who attended but chose to not select a student. It was a rocky start.<br />
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As the odds would have it, a new leadership teacher shortly came on board thereafter and embraced the idea of holding multiple events during the school year. She worked with our intro to leadership teacher to provide more students the opportunity to put on the event. The staff was encouraged to suggest names for each event, such as "Way TOGO" (where we'd have Togo's sandwiches) and "Nacho Average Student" (possibly my favorite selection to date).<br />
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Over the past few years, we've refined who our target student is for the event. It's not the student who is the captain of the basketball team nor is it the band student who made sectionals last week. It's not the straight A student who receives heaps of praise on a daily basis. It's for <a href="https://principaldays.blogspot.com/2016/06/an-invisible-kid.html" target="_blank">the invisible kid</a>. It's for that student who started the year with huge struggles and has finalized figured out how to manage the 8th grade work load. It's for that one student (and we have all seen this student at our schools) who has an unforgiving home life and just needs an adult on campus they can connect with. And yes, it's for that student who you're proud of for any reason you want.<br />
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At the recent event and every event previous, I interrupt the event with the following announcement. I first praise the students for being selected. I make mention that their teachers have anywhere from 25 to 250 students to select from and they were only allowed to select one... and I'll emphasize this last statement for the selected students: "and they chose you!"<br />
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This is my favorite moment of the event. I'll scan the students' faces and watch them slowly realize that this one adult that they see for 50 some-odd minutes each day thinks that they're special, that they're worthy, that they're amazing. I'll encourage the students to thank their teachers and every singe time, the students will begin to clap in unison for our staff.<br />
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We'll encourage our students to take home their certificate to their families. I'll reminder them that their certificate holds words of encouragement from their teacher. At the event, I'll intentionally circulate around to every student and read their certificate out loud to them. I've found it pretty powerful for each student to hear their teacher's words being said out loud to them by their principal. The student will often blush and then offer their thanks (without any prompting) to their teacher. It's not uncommon to get a few parent emails the following day from the parents of students who attended the event, sharing their gratitude and thanks.<br />
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Creating a school culture begins with hiring the very nicest adults you can find to join your staff. However, once you've got your staff, the next important step is cultivating a community where our kids know that we care and recognize each of them individually for just being amazing, for being themselves, and for being Nacho Average Student.<br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-42869885347725958062019-12-18T20:09:00.002-08:002020-06-04T22:00:02.600-07:00Broccoli & CauliflowerThis might come as a shock to anyone who knows me, but I'm often sarcastic in my conversations. I'm told that I have a pretty good "serious face" during these moments, making it rather difficult to figure out if I'm just joking or not. One teacher once told me that they believed I disliked them with a passion because they couldn't get a read on my thoughts. The irony here is that I only have positive opinions about this educator and they're probably one of the best I'll ever work with in my career.<br />
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So you can imagine how challenging it must be for my wife to know if I'm serious or not, as she's around me quite a bit.<br />
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While some would offer the advice to just not be so sarcastic (and that's great advice), my wife and I instead decided that we would have a "truth" word that I could add to my conversations that would tell her that I was being serious. The word we chose was <b>Cauliflower</b>.<br />
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There is one main rule regarding Cauliflower: my wife can't ask for Cauliflower; it can only be given. If there is a moment where she's unsure if I'm serious, she can't say "is this Cauliflower?" Instead, if I'm serious about something I'm saying, I'll just simply add the word "Cauliflower" to the conversation.<br />
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For example, if I've purchased her a spa weekend for just her and her friends and she doesn't believe me that it's actually happening, I'll simply say "honey, Cauliflower" and she now knows it's true. This is incredibly helpful in our relationship. I even utilize "Cauliflower" with some of my staff members. I suspect they appreciate it.<br />
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Tonight, my wife and I added a second word: <b>Broccoli</b>.<br />
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As previously shared, our daughters have significant special needs. We're trying to make things work in our home, but it's increasingly challenging every single day. <i>We have had more than one therapist recommend a residential placement for them</i>. We just can't envision placing our daughters in such an environment; could anyone imagine doing that to their child? That said, we recognize that it's something that is approaching fast on our family's horizon, if only for the safety of our sons and selves.<br />
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Given the special needs of our daughters, of which reactive attachment is a huge component, we don't travel anywhere as a family. Every single time we try, we fail. Breakfasts outside of our house (and even at home) turn into a chaotic mess. I can't think of a single car ride that's gone on for more than 10 minutes with all six of us in the car that didn't involve a significant issue (such as vomit, hitting, yelling, throwing, etc). If you ever want to know what torture feels like, imagine a flight delay with all four kids coming back from a family trip. Please note I said "trip" as <b>we don't ever have vacations</b>.<br />
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This is our life now.<br />
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The challenge as parents is how to raise our age-appropriate sons with as many wonderful experiences as possible, as our daughters cannot attend these events (too loud, too far, too many people, too few people, animals, Santa Claus, wind, cheering, music, etc...). So we, as parents, either have to split up and only one parent goes with the boys... or we don't go at all... or we try to go as a family, even though we know it won't work.<br />
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Tonight, we went as a family. It didn't work.<br />
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For those local to the Bay Area, there's the <a href="https://www.ncry.org/ride/train-of-lights/" target="_blank">Niles Train of Lights</a> in Fremont. My wife heard it was a great experience and wanted to go as a family. I pushed against the idea (see above) but acquiesced as I share her desire to provide these experiences for our kids. To the surprise of no-one, it was a complete failure.<br />
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Horrible weather. Rush hour traffic. Disregulated daughters. Hangry sons. Exhausted parents. Crowds. Lines. Noises. Santa Claus.<br />
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During the event, I looked at my wife and said that we needed a new word. If either of us came to the other with an event for our family to attend, their spouse could say "<b>Broccoli</b>" with the understanding that we'd take a step back from the idea we were really excited about and figure out if it really made sense for our family. I shared the example that I wanted to take all four kids to a baseball game this Summer and how my wife kindly expressed all of the ways that it could go wrong with all four. I shared how horribly traumatic our attempt to take the four kids to a sensory-friendly Nutcracker performance last week went. It's just how things are for our family right now.<br />
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So now we have two words; one that helps our conversations and one that helps our solidarity in best supporting our family. We hope that things will get better in the future, but for now,<b> it's just a lot of Broccoli. </b>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-91308455976665279782019-11-20T15:07:00.001-08:002019-11-20T15:07:55.620-08:00It's Not About the PastaEvery night, my wife and I collectively decide what television show we're going to watch that evening. I always push for The Challenge on MTV. She always votes for anything related to The Bachelor. Together, though, we can agree on Vanderpump Rules.<br />
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For those of you not familiar with the (fake) reality show titled Vanderpump Rules, it follows Lisa Vanderpump (of Real Housewife "fame") and the late-twenties servers at one of her restaurants. Many of the main cast of characters have had intertwining relationships and the weekly fallout therein makes for great, mindless television each week. </div>
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In <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnkHk9Wvp6E" target="_blank">a semi-recent scene</a> (words bleeped out, be careful!), James Kennedy (a "DJ" for the restaurant who calls himself the "White Kanye") and former BFF Lala (who believes she's Tupac reincarnated) have an argument that centers around Lala eating James' girlfriend's pasta. Lala boasted about doing so and James got quite upset. They proceeded to have an argument about the pasta eating in the middle of the street with the cameras rolling. During the argument, James would scream "it's not about the pasta!" but Lala would return the conversation back to the pasta. </div>
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It was fascinating television as they argued back and forth about the pasta incident, but as James said at the end of the clip, it truly wasn't about the pasta. It rarely is.</div>
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<b>One thing I've discovered is that when friends, colleagues, spouses, family members argue with one another, it's rarely about the pasta.</b></div>
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Often, the argument is about how someone felt slighted, ignored, excluded, upset about how they were treated. Complicating matters more, the other person is rarely aware of how this person is feeling because there's little to no communication. Thus, someone will suffer in silence, building up their pain until that last little drop of frustration overflows their internal already filled-to-the-brim cup of kindness. </div>
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Part of the problem is that we, as human beings, often shy away from hard conversations with the hope that things will get better on their own.</div>
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<b>Newsflash: They don't.</b></div>
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As an educator, I've seen incredibly talented co-workers privately share how hurt they were at the actions or the words of one of their colleagues. I'll listen and always encourage them to seek out that person to discuss. Most times, the person who has hurt them isn't even aware that their words or actions were taken in such a manner. Even more so, there's a miscommunication that led to their feelings and could be easily addressed. </div>
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What's interesting is that I've found many educators will shy away from having these conversations with their colleagues. Perhaps they think things will get better on their own. Maybe they are intimidated by the their co-worker. They might believe that nothing will change if they do bring up their concern. However, by staying silent, nothing improves and one's own mental health can suffer. And when they finally do speak up down the line about a separate incident, it's hard for their co-worker to understand why they're so upset about "the pasta". </div>
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Given that most of these conflicts occur through miscommunications, I'd like to suggest the following for any educator struggling with a colleague:</div>
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<b>First</b>, when you see or hear something that upsets you, <b>don't wait too long to respond</b>. If someone says something flippant in the staff room at lunch, let them know right then and there that what they said wasn't nice or accurate. If a teacher says that all of the kids at your school are lazy, speak up and let them know that's (hopefully) not true. Don't let the one teacher's narrative become your story.</div>
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<b>Second</b>, if you hear something that a colleague said through the grapevine, <b>try to speak with them directly</b>. Quotes quickly lose their context when shared outside of the original conversation. Just go straight to the source and ask for a clarification. Sarcasm doesn't travel well and is often a signifiant source of colleague conflict in schools. </div>
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<b>Third, assume positivity</b>. Maybe your co-worker is having a rough day, month, year. Maybe their comments are a cry for help and support. Are they a good educator, someone who you'd want your own child to be in their class? If so, perhaps assuming positivity throughout the miscommunication might help fix the minor conflict.</div>
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<b>Fourth, don't make the issues of others your own</b>. I believe it is good to support your peers, but there's a saying out there: These mountains you were carrying, you were only supposed to climb. If you absorb the negative emotions of others, you'll find yourself drowning in your days. Acknowledge that sometimes people will just say things they shouldn't and not always be as nice as you'd like them to be. This is ok. </div>
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<b>Fifth</b>, when you do have a hard conversation with a colleague, <b>don't argue about non-issues</b>. Just be kindly blunt and perfectly direct at how you're feeling. Don't expect them to own your feelings, but instead hopefully acknowledge how their words and actions contributed to the conversations you're having now. The hope is to rebuild whatever bridges were broken but it takes both parties to agree to this project. </div>
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And <b>sixth</b>, when you do have the conversation, <b>be ready and willing to let your frustrations over the first incident go</b>. If you harbor these thoughts beyond the initial chat, you haven't truly had a conversation worth having. Make sure when you have that colleague conversation, you're ready to fully clear the air so you're able to walk away anew. Otherwise, you'll just be internally upset while your colleague assumes things are perfectly fine.</div>
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Don't assume that things will just magically improve without working to address the concern. Don't wait for a second... or a third event to happen and cause the relationships to further deteriorate. When this happens, it's harder for both parties to address the original concern. After all, as the cast from Vanderpump Rules can confirm, <b>it's not about the pasta.</b></div>
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Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-64448236438886162532019-06-07T19:29:00.003-07:002019-06-07T19:30:33.497-07:00Graduation Speech - 2019 - Union Middle School<div dir="ltr" style="background-color: white; line-height: 1.2; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; vertical-align: baseline;">Below is my graduation speech for the Union Middle School class of 2019. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; vertical-align: baseline;">This was an odd speech to write. With everything going on at home these days with the four kids, there wasn't that organic moment I've experienced in years past that spurred the graduation speech to be born. I'm not sure why this year was different. I adore this year's class; it's filled with amazing kids. Even the kids I would see on a regular basis in the office are wonderful young adults. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">About two weeks ago, I wrote down a few bullet points about relationships. It's how I write a lot of my blogs. I take a topic, write down 3-5 main points, add in a few words/examples about each of the five points, and then fill in the details at a later date. </span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">A week later, I did just that and expanded on the bullet points, ending up with the below graduation speech. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">What I've got below is 99% of my first draft. That's another difference than past speeches: I didn't do a lot of revisions. It felt a bit odd to me as I've never written a graduation speech this way. I also didn't share the speech with my wife or my usual peer edits. I read it aloud on Wednesday to our assistant principal and that's it. My final few edits came this morning, the day of graduation. I actually started to write a different speech, a more generic one, at 8 am this morning but quickly discarded it. I'm not sure why I was fighting this speech so much.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">For whatever reason, I'm glad I stuck with my original words. It's a bit shorter than some of the past diatribes, but that's okay. I'm happy to have had the opportunity to share this message with our students as they promote on to high school. They're such a great class. We are going to miss them.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">As always, t</span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">hank you <i>parents</i> for your support over the past three years, t</span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">hank you <i>staff</i> for your continued dedication to our students, a</span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">nd thank you <i>students</i> for just being you. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Here is the graduation speech. Enjoy.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="background-color: transparent;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">-Todd</span></span></span></div>
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-b6cff93c-7fff-5655-edf9-ee0641990a85"><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Good Evening Everyone,</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For those of you in the audience who don’t know me, my name is Todd Feinberg, and I have been privileged to have been the principal of Union Middle School for the past seven years. As always, it is an honor to stand in front of you all today, amongst our 8th grade class and entire Union Middle School faculty. We truly care about each and every one of our Union Tigers. We hope you all will keep in touch.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To the class of 2019 - congratulations. You've (</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">almost</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">) made it and in a few short minutes, you'll be walking across this stage to signify your promotion from middle school and, perhaps more importantly, your official transition to high school. This is a rather important moment in your young adult lives. Enjoy it.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But first, a few words...</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Given this opportunity to address the class of 2019 for one final time, I'd like to thank each and every one of you for being a part of our school campus during your middle school years. We've loved your uniqueness, your charm, your determination, and everything else that's bundled up into the class of 2019. As always, I'd like to share a little advice on the eve of your descent into all things that are high school.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">While there’s many tidbits of positive affirmations I could share… such as “take risks, have fun, enjoy these days - they don’t last forever, challenge yourself in everything you do, etc etc…” Instead, I’d like to just talk about relationships and how important relationships are for you moving forward.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s because relationships matter.</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> Wherever you go, whatever you do, it's the relationships you've made along the way that highlight who you'll one day become.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Your relationships with your friends matter.</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> I encourage you to be the friend who doesn't just listen but also hears when someone's in need. Try your best to surround yourself with friends who bring you up and not down. Those you meet who thrive on negative attention aren't. truly. friends. at. all. And don't be afraid to make new friends - the person you were at age 6 in kindergarten isn't the same person you will be when you graduate high school in four years - just as you've changed, your friends, current and future, have changed as well. Remember - there is no limit to the number of friends you can have; everyone you meet has the potential to be a lifelong friend. Take advantage of these opportunities to do so.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Your relationships with trusted adults matter. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Specifically, your teachers. The ones who gave you a second chance on an assignment that you know you didn't best prepare for the first time around. The ones who spent the afternoons and evenings creating lessons that they hoped would engage and inspire you and build upon your desire to learn. The ones who wrote private high school recommendations for you. The ones who chose you as their Way To Go Student or Nacho Average Student or Deserving Dessert Student. The ones who opened up their classroom for you after hours to finish a test or seek extra help on that challenging classroom assignment. The ones who spent countless hours with you and your volleyball teammates in sixth grade, trying to help perfect your left handed serve. I'm talking about the entire UMS staff who are all present today to watch you walk across the stage. I can't stress enough how important it is to build positive relationships with your teachers. I'm only here today because of a chance encounter with my sophomore high school Spanish teacher - yes, blame Mr. Garcia everyone - who encouraged me to apply for a teaching job that started me on this path. Your teachers have been and will be some of your fiercest supporters. Continue to cultivate those relationships in high school and beyond. And don’t forget to thank them along the way.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Your relationships with your family members matter. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Trust me when I say this... even if you are battling your parents or guardians right now on every single logical consequence and limitation they've given you, in about twenty years time, you're going to realize just how right they were about </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">everything</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> that you disagreed with when you were 14. If you're shaking your head right now, saying "oh, it won't be me", then yes,</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> it most definitely will be you</span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. Your parents, your grandparents, that aunt you've never connected with, every family member you may have: they have a love for you that you probably won't understand until you're in their shoes, watching your child, nephew, grandchild walk across the stage at their middle school promotion. My mother in law passed away 18 months ago. Not a day goes by where my wife doesn't share that she wishes that she had just one more chance to talk to her mom. Just one phone call. One hug. Just anything to hear their voice. Students - please take a moment later to write a note to those family members who have helped you get to this point in your life. Thank them for being there for you.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And finally, perhaps most importantly, </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">your relationship with yourself matters. </span><span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I saved this one for last on purpose. Everyone is always so hard on themselves. You aren't expected to be perfect. Be nice to yourself. Give yourself a bit of grace. If you're one of those students who frequented my office during middle school, think about how our conversations have changed over the past three years and take what you've learned to build upon that success for high school. You are all such dynamic, talented young adults and we want you all to know that we're proud of you, even when the days seem darkest.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: "georgia"; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I hope you all continue to keep the relationships you've built over the past three years and grow even more moving forward. And if there's anything I can ever do to help you on your journey through life, don't hesitate to ask. Congrats on your promotion. We are all very proud of each and every one of you.</span></div>
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Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-91711482535334500952019-03-16T18:16:00.000-07:002019-03-16T18:16:00.446-07:00"But We've Always Done It This Way" is Your EnemyAs a middle school principal, I'm always looking for ways to improve from what we'd doing well to what we could be doing better. We always are looking for those school practices that we've had for the longest time and brainstorm how we could be upgrade the user experience with new perspectives, a little bit of work, and a culture of yes. This past year, we looked at how we ask our students to sign up for their elective with the goal to support all students and increase the odds every student would get their first choice elective.<br />
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The elective process begins in February as we build <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2013/11/a-how-to-build-master-schedule.html" target="_blank">the master schedule</a>. A lot of work goes into the master schedule as we balance class sizes, assign prep periods, and yes, place electives during certain periods. It's important where we place electives as students sign up for a block of electives within the same period. For instance, if they want Intro to Leadership, they also have to take Minecraft as they're the only two electives that specific period.<br />
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Fast forwarding to May, we meet with our incoming 6th grade parents and share what electives they can sign up for. Meanwhile, for our current students who are returning for the upcoming school year, we have them select their elective classes during the school day.<br />
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Here's why we have our students select their electives this way:<br />
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1) <b>We get close to a 100% response rate.</b> When we allowed kids to have a week at home to sign up for an elective, you saw a certain trend in which students didn't sign up for an elective. These students were then dropped into a random, non-preferred elective that Fall. Having the elective selection take place during the school day levels the elective playing field for all students, regardless of the parental support at home.<br />
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2) <b>We get instant results</b> and can make changes over the weekend if necessary. If there's an elective that is undersubscribed, we can make the change immediately rather than waiting until weeks later. It's incredibly helpful to have this data all at once and with sufficient time left in the school year.<br />
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3) <b>The students get to choose their elective</b> as opposed to the elective their parents want them to have. We're in middle school. If there's every a time for a student to venture out and try something that they're not familiar with or perhaps something they have an interest in but never got the opportunity to explore. Sometimes, a student's choice is in conflict with the parent's choice. If the students get to choose, I'm hopeful they'll select what they, and not their parents, want.<br />
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We went a different route this year for our electives, using Google Forms. Aside from a few basic questions, all of the three expectations above were met.<br />
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Based on a few of the selections, we needed to make a few changes. Specifically, we needed a third year long Spanish class and more Intro to Leadership classes. We switched a semester Intro to Spanish class to the year long Spanish class we needed and added a year long Intro to Leadership class, embedded with elements from our Design Thinking elective. These are normal changes that we work through every single year; nothing out of the ordinary.<br />
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With the change, we emailed all of the students who signed up for the semester Intro to Leadership class to provide the opportunity to select instead the year long Intro to Leadership class. The following day, I shared with all of our 6th and 7th grade families that there were a few spots left in this newly-created year long Intro to Leadership class as well as our new-to-UMS year long Computer Discoveries (read: Coding) class. I strongly encouraged to speak with their student and make sure that if they wanted a spot in one of these classes, please sign up as soon as possible.<br />
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What I didn't expect to happen then did: a huge influx of students changing their electives to these two classes.<br />
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<b>While this is a pretty cool thing, it's also rather complicating.</b><br />
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With a year long class, we have just 25-30 seats available for interested students. As sign ups inched up to 15... and then 20... and then 25... and then 28... for each of these electives, I realized that we were going to be oversubscribed with interested students.<br />
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So I sent a second communication twenty four hours later, sharing with our families that these electives were now "closed", based on significant student interest. We still allowed students to sign up for these electives but their selection would now show that they missed the cut-off deadline. Essentially, they'd be put on a waitlist for the class.<br />
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Some parents were not happy with the news.<br />
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One parent emailed, telling me (rather than asking) that their student needed to be in the year long Intro to Leadership class. Even when I explained the situation, providing a look behind the elective curtain, they didn't change their opinion: their student to be enrolled in the course. We went back and forth a bit, me trying to explain how the elective process works, them responding with a constant expectation of their child being placed into the elective. Even when I shared how it is an elective <b>request</b>, not an elective mandate, the parent seemed to be unmoved from their constant opinion regarding their student's upcoming elective.<br />
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Another parent was upset that they only had 24 hours to sign up for their student's elective. As a working parent, they shared how hard it was to get a text during the work day and follow up that evening. It was a terse conversation that prompted a follow up phone call to smooth things over. The follow up communication allowed me to point out how the year long Coding class was available to their student the previous Friday with the warning that if the year long class filled up, we wouldn't be able to proceed with the semester class. All in all, things ended up okay as their child enrolled in the class with plenty of time remaining. Usually, it just works out in the end.<br />
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And there was a third noteworthy parent who was disappointed by the "first come, first served" nature of the availability for the year long Intro to Leadership class. Truthfully, I agree with them; I'm not a huge fan of "first come, first served" procedures. With the limitations we have with only so many seats for our year long electives, it's an unfortunate predicament we're in. As we progressed through our conversation, the parent responded with the following:<br />
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<i>"I'm sure it will be fine! My kid - who thinks a lot - is already done thinking about it. ;) I expect there's no perfect method and there will be complaints no matter what. I appreciate your responsiveness to the "small things." It gives me confidence that if I need to address a larger issue at UMS, it will be considered carefully.</i><br />
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<i>Btw, one of my older kids was a student who was dismayed, at registration in August, to find he was assigned an elective he didn't want: Intro to Spanish. The teacher later told others the story of how he asked an unknown teacher, who was assisting students on registration day, about switching out of his randomly assigned Intro to Spanish class. She said, "Hi, I'm the Spanish teacher," and directed him to speak with several former students nearby, and told him he could try the class and request a change later if he wanted. He ended up loving the class..."</i><br />
<i><br /></i>Overall, the change in how we ask our students to select their electives was a positive one. We definitely saw a significant reduction during the school year in students asking to switch into a new elective. Fewer elective change requests frees up our counselor and administrative team to focus on more kid-centric concerns during the first few days of the semester.<br />
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If there are past practices at your school that you've been hesitant to change, perhaps saying "but we've always done it this way," take the next few months to consider revamping your approach and consider a fresh, kid-focused shift in your policies for the upcoming year. <b>It's not about being good enough; it's about doing our best for the kids. </b><br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-39537144159971852862018-11-03T21:12:00.000-07:002018-11-04T20:55:57.876-08:00Sharing Your Admin StoryOne of the hardest things of being a principal is speaking in front of adults. Kids, no problem. They're great. Sure, they remember all of things you wish you hadn't said (and somehow they always seem to repeat these seemingly-innocuous comments years later when they visit) but overall, they're usually a sweet, easy-to-work-with audience.<br />
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Adults are a whole different story. Whether it is a weekly meeting with our teaching staff or an overflowing gym of parents at Back to School night, there's just something about speaking in front of adults that puts my nerves on high alert. I'm told that it's not noticeable and everything presents relatively normal during these speeches. Inside, however, I'm second guessing every word, worried I'm not connecting with everyone in the audience, and often will veer off-script with some silly humor that doesn't always hit the mark.<br />
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Given the struggles I regularly experience with speaking in front of adults, I find it interesting how much I enjoy sharing my admin story with other administrators at various conferences and professional development opportunities. My best guess is that I truly love <b>the opportunity</b> of being able to share my "admin story" with other administrators and educators.<br />
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Being an administrator is in itself a rather lonely job. Sure, you're surrounded by a thousand students, two thousand parents, a staff of a hundred hard-working adults, and other student-focused administrators at other school sites and district office. But day to day, you make decisions separately in your silo, always trying to prevent the spinning plates from falling. Each of your decisions, no matter how innocuous, gets second guessed, sometimes by an upset staff member, an irrational member of the parent community, or a supervisor at the district office. I'm blessed to have an incredibly talented staff, a very positive and kind parent community, and an extremely support district office (note: this trifecta is very rare). Still, it doesn't make a principal's day any easier: That's one fo the reasons why sharing my "admin story" with other administrators is something I look forward to.<br />
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This Fall, I presented at two conferences: CUE Admin RockStar and Fall CUE (don't say these two words too fast...). I've <a href="https://principaldays.blogspot.com/2017/05/an-invitation-to-lead.html" target="_blank">blogged about my initial CUE Admin RockStar experience</a> and was pleasantly surprised to be invited back. The CUE Admin RockStar conference is for current and future school administrators. Held in Truckee in late September, I presented on Mobile Leadership and Blogging over the two days for a total of five presentations. Two days of nonstop talking. Heads nodding. Lots of thank you's. Tons of DMs thereafter of future connecting and support. It helps bring our principal worlds a little closer together when we realize that the situations we educators face are more alike than different.<br />
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The second conference, Fall CUE, was another session on my admin story, titled "Building a Better Admin: Lead by Example." Here, I shared tons of tidbits on how I support my admin life to allow for increased parent communication with our school, how the importance of relationships can drive a student's school experience, and, of course, my secrets with Google Forms, Docs, Sheets, and Sites to streamline a principal's workflow. During the presentation, I will often share topical "war stories" with the admin community in the room, whether it's a silly student story, an out-of-control parent from my last district, or just some personal notes of what it's like to have four kids. This experience doesn't feel like a presentation as much as the congregation of admins coming together to smile, learn, and exhale.<br />
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Truthfully, there's another reason I enjoy presenting at conferences: <b>It's a compliment to be chosen</b>. It means that someone in the edu-world values what I have to say and think it could be valuable for others. Principals don't get a lot of positive feedback; being chosen to present says we're on the right admin track.<br />
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And I'm always surprised when my sessions get selected. I don't feel like I have the secret ingredients of what it takes to be a successful principal. I'm not even sure some days, despite the positive feedback I receive from parents and fellow district educators, that I'm doing a good job. Most of the time, I'm just doing what I feel is best for our students and providing our staff whatever they need to be successful. A lot of the work that a principal does to support their school goes unnoticed. It's just part of the job.<br />
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Prior to the CUE Admin RockStar event, I was asked by the organizer to provide a morning keynote. It was suggested that I share the same keynote as the previous RockStar event where I spoke about flipping our typical <a href="https://principaldays.blogspot.com/2017/08/different-spin-on-my-back-to-school.html" target="_blank">Back to School night</a> into something a bit different. This would have been the easier option. I didn't take it.<br />
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Instead, I shared my real "Admin Story" with the fellow conference-attending administrators who had given up their weekend to improve their practice. My keynote centered around <a href="https://principaldays.blogspot.com/2017/12/molly-and-her-bike.html" target="_blank">my Molly</a> and <a href="https://principaldays.blogspot.com/2016/11/they-dont-usually-get-invited.html" target="_blank">what it's like to have a child with special needs</a>. I talked about how important it is as an administrator to support all students, <a href="https://principaldays.blogspot.com/2016/09/part-2-parent-of-2-special-education_20.html" target="_blank">especially those with special needs</a>. I shared my thoughts on the importance of hiring nice staff members, how my wife and I do not often feel that we're not doing that great job as parents, and the likelihood that the parents of special needs students at your school are probably feeling defeated by the limited opportunities and supports their child's school provides. I discussed that one meeting where, at age 4, the school psychologist wanted to label our daughters as <b>intellectually disabled.</b><br />
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<a href="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/YYjNPo4HzfjRJsT5RQ3TyQpBArX0E5Ptyd_rH-j4ArnzZVdBPckW-Plh_5frkyB7EQkWwZTn5ZEIpP_hf_NiXplhTdkWSyCCwu-XS7Pu6Isvc9-qXEpTkv-B_Q93YgIID6Yyj4SDLcA" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/YYjNPo4HzfjRJsT5RQ3TyQpBArX0E5Ptyd_rH-j4ArnzZVdBPckW-Plh_5frkyB7EQkWwZTn5ZEIpP_hf_NiXplhTdkWSyCCwu-XS7Pu6Isvc9-qXEpTkv-B_Q93YgIID6Yyj4SDLcA" width="111" /></a>Somewhere along the way, despite how much I enjoy these admin talks, I lost the ability to speak. I rolled through a few of the slides, all pictures of my Molly. Her smile. Her first steps. Her silly dancing in front of a mirror.<br />
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I managed to close the keynote shortly thereafter, tying in an earlier thread to my daughters' plight. A fellow presenter at the conference gave me an instant hug and then publicly praised my ability to share my story.<br />
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And I think that's the job of a school administrator: <b>pulling down your walls and sharing your story.</b> Be upfront and honest about who you are and what you're struggling with. Our parent communities don't expect us to be perfect; they just want us to care. Sharing your story as a school administrator can help bridge these relationships toward the common goal of working together for what's best for your students. It doesn't mean it's going to be easy, especially for those administrators like myself who just don't like speaking in front of adults. But as I tell our students, the right thing to do and the hard thing to do are often the same thing to do.<br />
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<b>Share your story.</b><br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-44913443632395484972018-09-19T20:06:00.000-07:002018-09-19T20:10:59.244-07:00Trust the Process (and the Principal)I've blogged about <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2018/03/trust-me.html" target="_blank">Trust</a> before. I've called it a four letter word. All of this is true.<br />
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But as we've started another school year, I've faced a constant stream of questions and inquiry from our parent community that hints at a lack of trust in the school system.<br />
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Let me preface this blog with the following: I don't blame our parent community if they are hesitant to trust their child's principal. I've <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2016/09/part-2-parent-of-2-special-education_20.html" target="_blank">blogged before</a> about the struggles my wife and I have faced in best supporting our daughters in their school district. If you don't have trust, every action by your student's principal is put under the microscope moving forward.<br />
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Knowing that the transition to middle school is a challenge, I prepared <a href="https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1ORFw02Vb0WljC58S7WBB2U4_Vfa0M_dvCtuasWvHeq8/edit" target="_blank">specific slides</a> for our 5th grade parent night. When our parents had questions thereafter, I put together a <a href="https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gTJe5LUf_ad0G5NHrYjEHXuX1cyKCeJ6aPfKVtN56tI/edit#heading=h.nj23sjpj5u97" target="_blank">FAQ</a> to best respond. During the summer, I shared <a href="https://docs.google.com/document/d/1itlOAxc7nNNjBhQ73y7GTveFIpZydJouCW_f512RZIQ/edit" target="_blank">additional information</a> with our incoming parent community. I sent home <a href="https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1CXGWdpGr7PeJSYZXNiDdIcMJUa8Au-70b0kdxElfqt0/edit#slide=id.g642dc3280_0_106" target="_blank">reminders</a> during the summer months. With our 6th grade parent orientation, I shared <a href="https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1GIhHqdIq2AfiPCL26a0nj7FHtNAJN0sCcicOjEVnvvs/edit#slide=id.p5" target="_blank">additional information</a>. Over the days following this meeting, I answered <a href="https://docs.google.com/document/d/1d33c357gIVsXgdJE4HedIO3ru1_gqGNoh9oqInRltKg/edit" target="_blank">more questions</a> about the transition to middle school.<br />
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I'm not sure you'll find a middle school that shared as much information with their incoming parent community in the summer prior to the start of the school year as what we provided this past summer.<br />
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And yet, based on the continued flurry of concerns and emails from our parent community, <b>it still doesn't feel like enough.</b><br />
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It doesn't feel like enough because we're still receiving questions and concerns... and most of these questions have answers that are harvested within trust.<br />
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Trust that we're going to take care of your student.<br />
Trust that we know how to best support our students.<br />
Trust that we're prepared for the upcoming school year.<br />
Trust that we've ready for every event and activity your student may want to participate in.<br />
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And yes, we've received some unique (because there are no such thing as silly) questions as well...<br />
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Yes, we have WiFi in our homework center (how else would they be able to do their homework?)<br />
Yes, students are allowed to have backpacks during the school day (ok, was this a real question?)<br />
Yes, we have campus maps (on the website and also available in the office)<br />
Yes, we have clubs your student can participate in (and you'll receive information at a later date)<br />
Yes, you're allowed to walk your student to school each morning (it's also ok to let them walk the five blocks on their own).<br />
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<b>In the end, all of these questions come down to trust.</b><br />
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I remind our parent community that I've been at UMS for the past 8 years and have a very experienced and talented front office staff - we know what we're doing.<br />
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I share that our teaching staff is dialed in times ten and know how to best support your student - this is the best middle school staff anywhere.<br />
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I spend my summer, often at the expense of family time, making sure that your student has the best schedule possible for their 6th grade experience - we literally hand schedule every single student, spending more time perfecting our master schedule than what you'll find at any other middle school.<br />
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And I overshare as much as possible with everything our parent community needs to know for their 6th grade year - all in an effort to ease their worries and concerns.<br />
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<b>In the end, I ask for trust.</b><br />
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Trust that we know how to best support your student.<br />
Trust that we've hand scheduled your student for their math class based on multiple data points.<br />
Trust that while we have over a thousand students at our school, we share the sentiment that your student is also the most important student at our school.<br />
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And I ask that you trust your student's teachers, that you trust our front office, and that you trust your student's principal... me.<br />
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Know that it's going to be ok.<br />
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Understand that we care just as much about your student's success as you do.<br />
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<b>Trust our process.</b><br />
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We share the same desired outcome as you do for your student: a school experience where learning is fun in a safe environment led by dynamic and caring educations. That's what I'm going to promise for all of our incoming 6th grade students.<br />
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Let's end with an unsolicited direct message from an edu-famous author I received this week:<br />
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"My very old friend, (UMS PARENT), has his twins in your 6th grade. In a recent catching up email, he mentioned how great it is to have the kids at Union and how much he appreciated your leadership. Thought you'd like to know that. Happy Tuesday."<br />
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<b>It's ok to trust us. We know what we're doing. It's going to be ok.</b><br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-33714335301735848102018-06-08T15:01:00.002-07:002018-06-08T15:01:38.034-07:00Graduation Speech - 2018 - Union Middle School<div dir="ltr" style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; vertical-align: baseline;">Below is my graduation speech for the Union Middle School class of 2018. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; vertical-align: baseline;">As shared below, I wrote this speech three months earlier. Often, it is a middle school story, a silly student interaction, or just a simple swing dancing video that inspires the graduation speech. This year was no different.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">One of our staff members, <a href="https://twitter.com/mrsdunavan" target="_blank">Carla Dunavan</a>, helped with the editing. Another staff member, <a href="https://twitter.com/mszangwill" target="_blank">Jennifer Zangwill</a>, assisted with a second peer review. As always, my wife provided multiple suggestions on how to improve the speech. In the end, I think it came together quite well and will be one of my favorite speeches during my time at Union Middle.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Giving the speech was a challenge in itself. For whatever reason, I'm often ill during the last week of school each year, dating back to my teaching days. This year, I lost my voice and threw out my back. Fun times, especially in preparation for our promotion ceremony. It all ended well as I managed to get through the speech without (too much of an) issue and wish the class of 2018 the best in their future endeavors. This has been such an interesting class of students. There is so much potential within them. I'm hopeful they continue to make us proud. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Thank you parents for your support over the past three years. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Thank you staff for your continued dedication to our students.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">And thank you students for just being you. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Here is the graduation speech. Enjoy.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="background-color: transparent;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">-Todd</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Good Evening Everyone,</span></span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-bbec6aed-e15b-0065-e509-75049687fc98" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></b>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Todd Feinberg, and I have been privileged to have been the principal of Union Middle School for the past six years. It is an honor to stand in front of you all today and means a great deal to me. I truly care about each and every one of my Union Tigers. I hope you all will keep in touch.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m writing this speech on March 16th, just under three months ago. It’s a Friday night. My children are slowly falling asleep. I’m sitting on the living room couch, thinking how to best express </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">my love and appreciation</span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> for you, the Union Middle School class of 2018. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">It’s a bit odd to write a promotion speech months in advance. Truth be told, I was inspired by a swing dancing video that Mr. Barbara sent me this afternoon. We’ll get to the video in a bit.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I’m not sure if this graduating class remembers the 8th grade assembly we had back in early March. At this assembly, I shared my hope and expectations for the positive legacy our 8th graders would leave over the last trimester of their final year at Union Middle School. Our students may recall that I used memes during the presentation. Our students may also recall that none of them laughed at any of the memes. That’s ok... I thought the memes were amusing… Perhaps unsurprisingly, the only thing that got a reaction during our presentation was when I mentioned the video game Fortnite. (I’m anticipating that I’m going to have to pause while everyone under the age of 17 squealed at the mere mention of Fortnite.) Ah yes, Fortnite. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">At this assembly with the 8th grade class, I mentioned my daughters. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I shared how my wife and I adopted them from Russia six and a half years ago. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I explained how they attend their local school just across the street from our house each day for first grade. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I shared how they both have massive special needs.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I then shared that they don’t have any friends. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">None, I said. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I let you, my 8th grade class, know how hard this was on me, not your principal but just a parent, to see their student, my special needs daughters, struggle at making friends.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And I shared that all I wanted for my daughters was for their classmates to just be inclusive and to be kind. It’s what I asked of you, our 8th grade students, at this assembly for the remainder of their school year and beyond: </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Be Kind. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This is where our 8th grade students got quiet with compassion. Pindrop silent.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This is who you are, my promoting class of three hundred forty four young, rambunctious, silly teenagers.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are caring young adults. You are as inclusive as a teenager can attempt to be. At Union Middle and in our local community, we see you trying your best to lead with sincere care and concern.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">We love to be near your infectious kindness. It is what I admire most of you and what I know will bring you much success in your upcoming endeavors, whatever they may be.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This 8th grade class is reflective about their shortcomings and interested in their dreams. They have an incredible amount of support from their family, friends, and Union Middle School teachers. This class is incredibly magnetic, charming, interesting, and, most of all, kind.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">This is the class of 2018. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">And so, on March 16th, Mr. Barbara sent me a swing dancing video. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">In the video, there was an 8th grade girl swing dancing with a 7th grade boy. The bleachers were filled as many of our 8th grade students, all sitting respectfully and encouraging the two students during their dance. They did a two minute swing dance routine, quite impressively going through all of the correct steps. At the end, just before they returned to their seats, they were met with applause from the crowd, who were showing their appreciation for the performance. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">And while this seems like a rather uneventful video during this retelling, I couldn’t help but wish that my 1st grade daughters had a mentor friend, just like this 8th grade student. A friend who took the initiative to partner with them in school activities. A classmate who helped make their school days a bit brighter. A young, rambunctious, silly teenager who believed in inclusion for all kids, no matter the social circle they all belonged to.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To this 8th grade female student, partnering with the 7th grade boy wasn’t anything special. Here, in middle school, where kids often </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">drown in self-awareness</span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and a fear of being teased for being kind to someone a bit different</span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, she was thrilled to perform the dance, to lead the 7th grade boy through the routine, and incredibly compassionate as she encouraged him by the hand to bow before the crowd of their peers at the end of their performance. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YzhSwQrYX4s/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/YzhSwQrYX4s?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">You may have noticed that we did not hand out the Principal’s Award earlier. Instead, it is at this moment that I’d like to announce the student selected by the principal (that’s me) for their dedication and commitment to UMS over the past three years. Simply put, this student is something special. She is incredibly gracious, the type of student leader we need for these current times, and often, just with a smile or a helping hand, has a way to make middle school a much better place for everyone involved. It also happens to be the same 8th grade student from the swing dance story I’ve just shared. (pause as people murmur and figure out who gets the award)</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">I would like to recognize Nicole as this year’s recipient of the 2018 Principal’s Award.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">(pause for award)</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">What Nicole did on this random day on March 16th is what most mirrors what I see in this 8th grade class. </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">While every class has shortcomings, there is no better quality that I’d want for a class than to be kind.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">And you, the class of 2018, are truly a class of grace. You have all shown the ability to be incredibly compassionate. I wish my daughters had you as their classmates, if only because of how inclusive I’ve found the class of 2018 to be.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">In my promotion speeches, I’ll often share advice about high school, what to do, to try your best, to stay away from excess time on technology, how you should always listen to your parents... blah blah blah… I’m not going to do that tonight. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Instead, I will close with just one request for the class of 2018: </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">please continue to be kind.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> If so, I know you, and those around you, will be more than ok on your post middle school journey.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Thank you to the class of 2018 for the memories. We will miss you. Congratulations on your promotion. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-56549155302220623932018-04-27T18:12:00.000-07:002018-04-27T18:20:01.186-07:00First Impressions for your Interview<div style="background-color: white; color: #212121; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">On the subtopic "Principals" within the rabbit hole that is Reddit, user <i>micu25</i> asked the following question:</span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">"I emailed the AP that interviewed me yesterday for a teaching job. It was a thank you email but in the email I had names of two different schools (one the same one different) I was tired and stressed and messed up. I sent a sorry email but I probably won’t get the job now huh?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Micu25 was referring to the often-practiced "send a follow up email to the interviewing committee after you meet them in the actual interview to say thanks for their time."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">For Micu25, they made a slight mistake in referring back to the name of the school they were interviewing for and were now worried that this accidental mistake would hurt their chances of landing a second interview or worse, the job itself. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">I've found this practice of sending an email of thanks to be a very interesting situation. You don't not want to do it if the person you've interviewed for is expecting it, but at the same time you don't want to make an error in the reply or seem too eager (read: desperate) for the position. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Although I haven't applied for a job over the past six years, when I had interviewed for an administrative position, I'd always send the email to the principal or HR director afterwards. Now that I’m on the other side, I realize how little difference this email makes. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Point being, I’ve made up my mind whether or not you’re a candidate for the job a few moments into your response to the first question we’ve asked you. Sometimes, it’s just as simple as how you handle introductions. By midway through the questions, you can confirm that you’re a candidate by continuing to do well or completely slip up and no longer be a top choice. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #212121; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">While I don't use an actual point system in my mind, the following example may make a bit of sense: within the first 90 seconds of talking, you have a score of 1-100 with 100 being the best possible score. You may have walked in, been the most </span>charismatic<span style="font-size: 12pt;">, caring adult we've ever encountered, started your response to the first interviewing question, and just knocked it out of the park. You'd get a really high score for this performance, right off the bat. Alternatively, you may have walked in, not made eye contact, used profanity during the introductions, and then just babbled about nothingness for the next three minutes, hijacking the interview before it even begins. This would be a score much closer to 0. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #212121; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">This initial score is important. It's the first impression score. I've found that no matter what happens during the interview, a candidate can only shift a dozen of points or so in either direction. Essentially, whatever score you've received by each member of the panel within the first 90 seconds of your interview, it's going to be really close to whatever score you end up with, holistic or tabulated, by the end of the </span>interview<span style="font-size: 12pt;">.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #212121; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">This means that if only candidates with a 70 point score are sent forward to the second round and you started with 50, there's a strong likelihood that you're not a candidate for a return visit. When this </span>happens<span style="font-size: 12pt;">, we are both wasting our time with the interview: there’s no way for you to get to 70 for the second round. Likewise, if you start strong and in the 90’s, it’s hard to slip up and not get a second round chance. The first impression you make during an interview is that important.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #212121; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">Thus, sending that letter of thanks makes zero difference in your chances of making it to the second round or being accepted for the final position. The interviewing committee has already put forth the worthy candidates by the time you've hit the send button. If anything, I think it can hurt more than help. If you've already been forwarded to the second round and then send an email with a spelling or </span>grammatical<span style="font-size: 12pt;"> error (examples: use “your” instead of “you’re”, make "thank you" into "thank u" or heaven forbid put two spaces after a period), you could lose a bit of luster for your second round chances. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">This isn't to say it's not a nice gesture. If you're the top candidate and you send a nice, thoughtful message, it's definitely nice to see a "thank you" email. If I were to apply for a higher up position eventually, I’d probably send a “thank you” email too, even though I know it may not make a bit of difference.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">But truthfully, sending the "thank you" email does nothing for your candidacy. You are either a second round candidate or not from within the first 90 seconds of the interview. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">First impressions matter. A lot.</span></div>
Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-54520848157512228432018-03-24T19:09:00.000-07:002018-03-24T21:43:21.107-07:00Rookie Teacher, Expert InterviewOver the past 72 hours, I've met no less than three dozen student teachers looking for their first paid teaching position for the fall. Wednesday was spent at Santa Clara University, interviewing twelve candidates and today was the Santa Clara County Job Fair where I met another two dozen more.<br />
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I walked away from these interviews with a few key thoughts, almost all of which were extremely positive.<br />
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First and foremost, WOW, there are some talented future teachers out there looking for a district to join. Every candidate I met had distinct strengths that would be a value add for any district. There were so many truly skilled newly credentialed teachers who are going to make a significant impact in the lives of our students. It was reassuring to see and know that the next generation of educators are a solid group of forward-thinking individuals.<br />
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There was one re-occurring theme throughout the interviews. Almost every candidate I spoke with had the same stock answers to a few specific questions and almost always had the same response when asked "do you have any questions for me?" Throughout the days, I could almost predict what their answer might be and what questions they had for me at the conclusion of the interview.<br />
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I understand that they've received the same training from the same professors at the same credentialing program in the same peer group. However, if they truly want to stand out from the crowd, there are a few key suggestions that these "rookie teachers" could implement to raise up their interviewing skills to "expert" or even perhaps "boss" levels.<br />
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<b>1) Prep for the interview</b><br />
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When you hear that you're going to interview for a particular district, find out everything you can about the district. Ask around. Google stalk the schools. Read up on all of the websites for each individual school within the district. Find their Twitter Hashtags and follow it. I'd even recommend driving over the district and visiting the school at off-hours. Get a feel for what the school is about.<br />
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<b>2) Prep for the interviewer</b><br />
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And don't stop at just learning about the district and the school. Research the principals. Learn all you can about the superintendent or the assistant superintendent of HR. How long have they been in the district. Where did they previously work. Connect with people who you know who also may know them. Ask for a reference. Don't go into the interview cold; find out everything you can about the interviewer and be ready to show how you're a perfect fit for their staff.<br />
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<b>3) You have to be on Twitter</b><br />
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Zero of the new-to-teaching candidates I spoke with over the past three days are on Twitter. Not a one. Twitter is a fire hose of information for today's educators. You should know who <a href="https://twitter.com/lhighfill" target="_blank">Lisa Highfill</a> is and what Hyperdocs are. You should read up on <a href="https://twitter.com/jcorippo" target="_blank">Jon Corippo</a> and everything #eduprotocol related. Be ready to share a story about a lesson idea that you found on Twitter. Mention an edu-famous book you've read outside of your credential program that drives your future practice. Let the interviewer know what Twitter hashtags you frequent and what Twitter chat's you've participated in. Even if your interviewer isn't huge with the Twitter world, you're going to impress them by demonstrating how you're always looking to improve your practice.<br />
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<b>4) There is more to the classroom than Class Dojo.</b><br />
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Perhaps it is an elementary thing, but the love for Class Dojo amongst the teaching candidates was a bit surprising. I actually liked the idea of Class Dojo early on, but then I struggled with how public the negative feedback for students is and how much it feels like public shaming within the classroom. When I asked one of the candidates about the negative affects the public feedback may pose within a classroom, it was very clear that they'd never considered the possibility of this byproduct within the program. I'd recommend heavily researching every app you use within your student teaching classroom and be prepared to share how you promote the positives provided for your students while acknowledging how you limit the negatives it could bring.<br />
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<b>5) If you're going to ask a question at the end of the interview, make sure it's meaningful.</b><br />
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Almost every inquiry I heard at the end of the formal set of interviewing questions centered on one of three things: What PD do you have for your staff? Do you support PLCs on your campus? How do you support new teachers? It was very obvious that the candidates had been prepped with a stock list of questions to ask at the end of the interview. After I responded, the candidate would just move on to their next question on the list. Again, quite clear that these weren't truly their questions but ones that they'd been encouraged to ask.<br />
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If you want to stand out of the group, you have to come up with your own questions or instead prepare a statement that summarizes your interest at the conclusion of the interview. Truthfully, the interviewer has already made up their mind by question 10 whether or not you're a good fit for their district. Asking them a question about the professional development in the district isn't going to tip the scales in your favor. Even more so, you should already know about the professional development we offer as you should be on Twitter and following our district hashtag.<br />
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<b>6) And speaking of professional development, let me offer the following three letters...<a href="http://www.cue.org/" target="_blank">CUE</a>. </b><br />
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Look it up. Join. Attend a local CUE conference on your own dime. Learn amongst current educators and your future peer group. Meet administrators and take the initiative to introduce yourself to them. Don't rely on a district to provide you with the professional development you hope to one day receive. Start during your time as a student teacher or perhaps even earlier. Find a local EdCamp on a Saturday and join the conversation. When an interviewer asks you how you best prepare for your future educational career, be ready to share what you've learned at these conferences and how it will shape your practice in and out of the classroom.<br />
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It's been a whirlwind over the past few days and I'm excited to see which candidates join our district for the upcoming school year (and beyond). I suspect that almost every candidate I spoke with is going to find a placement for the fall. Don't be afraid to be a bit choosy. Make sure you find the best fit for you. If it ends up being in our district or better yet at Union Middle School, glad to have you aboard. You're joining an amazing team and couldn't have landed in a better place. (Disclaimer: I'm a bit biased) :)<br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-2393192250823521322018-03-24T17:54:00.002-07:002018-03-24T21:42:49.296-07:00Daily Decisions as an AdminWhen I'm asked the most challenging part of my daily job duties, I always have the same response: always having to make decisions on the spot.<br />
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<b>Sometimes, these decisions are easy to make.</b> </div>
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For example, at a recent school dance, we were in a bit of a predicament. The DJ showed up an hour late to our two hour dance. For sixty of the longest minutes any adult will ever experience, we had four hundred students in our cafeteria, expecting music and instead getting nothing of the sort. Surprisingly, our students were incredibly well behaved. They started their own dance party (sans music) and just enjoyed the company of their classmates. I had assumed we would experience something closer to what happened in the Lord of the Flies, but no, they just waited for the DJ to arrive.</div>
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So it's now 7 pm and the DJ is about to start. Our students had expected a full two hour dance and were only going to get a short 60 minutes. I checked in with our Activities Director and then the DJ himself. Both were willing to extend the dance for an extra 30 minutes. On the spur of the moment a decision was made to extend our dance until 8:30 pm. We announced the decision to the students. They responded with prolonged cheers. Almost on cue, the DJ started playing a Justin Timberlake song and everything was back to as normal as a middle school dance can be.</div>
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The decision to extend the dance may seem like an easy one. However, I realized that there could be complications with the decision. After all, our parent and staff volunteers had expected to participate from 6 pm to 8 pm. Extending the dance an extra 30 minutes was taking advantage of their generosity. I also considered the text I'd have to send my wife, sharing that I'd be home a half hour later than expected. There were also parents who showed up at 8 pm and had to wait for an extra 30 minutes before their students was ready to depart for the evening. </div>
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Fortunately, our chaperones were extremely kind in their understanding, my wife completely understood, and the parents who arrived early got a in-person demo on how to sign up for the Remind app to receive my text messages and updates. </div>
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<b>Sometimes, these decisions are extremely difficult to make.</b> </div>
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Rewind a week and we're having our annual UMS Home and School Club Blast. The Blast is something akin to a carnival where our current (and future) students spend an evening on our campus with fun games, bouncy houses, and tons of food. It's a huge fundraiser and a fun experience for everyone.</div>
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Earlier in the week, our community had been rocked by both national and local events. There was a Las Vegas shooting that ended up becoming one of the nation's worst mass shootings. Locally, there were reports that a local high schooler had almost been kidnapped en route to/from school. Our students were somewhat on edge; young teenagers who have confronted a flood of social media post on such adult topics. </div>
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At some point, during the event, something shifted. I noticed our students acting a bit different. I moved toward what seemed like the epicenter of the kid chaos and was shocked at what I was hearing: "there is a kidnapper and a rapist and a scary man dressed in black and they have a gun."</div>
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For a split second, I froze. My mind wandered and became scared for our school community, for our students. I quickly shook off the fear and listened to our students. What information did they have? What did they know? What exactly did they see?</div>
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As I spoke to more and more students, it became increasingly clear that this was a situation that was rooted in rumor. Nevertheless, I had to make a tough decision: How do I ensure the safety of our students while not overreacting to potentially false student rumors. </div>
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My answer was clear and yet difficult to make: <b>you have to treat the rumor as fact.</b></div>
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Carefully, the assistant principal and I, based on all of the information gleaned by the student responses, walked the side streets where the individual may have been located. We had already communicated with both staff and our parent volunteers on the rumors. Everyone was on alert. </div>
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Our local police department had been called and were now on site. We followed up with them, sharing our facts of the situation and asking for advice. They reassured us that, based on their own conversations with students and witnesses, that there was no individual with a weapon and that our students and community were safe. We then relayed this message to our parents, staff, and students. </div>
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Now that we had effectively researched the threat and determined, with the support of our local police department, that our students' concerns were based on false rumors, our job was now to spread the word and diffuse the spread of the rumors that had already taken a life of their own.</div>
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That evening, I prepared a recap of the events for our parent community and sent the message out first thing Saturday morning. I wanted to give our parent community the chance to speak with our students prior to the chaotic gossip on instagram took hold later that day. </div>
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Upon our return to campus that Monday, I began a two day investigation into what actually happened. By the end of the day on Tuesday, I had finally pieced together what had actually happened the previous Friday night. </div>
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A few students saw an adult in a black sweatshirt walking down the street by our school. They began to point at this person and may have pointed back. Our students, concerned that this person pointed at them, began to chase this individual who then took off running. </div>
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Another student, upon hearing this story, said that if this person came after them, they'd chase him off with a baseball bat.</div>
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Another student, as if this were a game of telephone, heard a modified story of the baseball bat response. They were told that a student who lived across the street had just chased a man out of their house with a baseball bat. </div>
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Another student, present for the story, believed they saw someone in a nearby bush and decided to throw rocks in their direction. As the rocks hit the bush, this student then told another student that they thought they heard the 'click-click" of a gun. </div>
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The other student then shared this story with five more students who then each shared it with five more. </div>
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So on Friday, we had a random man in a black sweatshirt pointing at our students, escaping from a nearby house after being chased by a middle school student with a baseball bat, hiding in a bush, getting rocks thrown at them and then loading their weapon to retaliate, and ultimately being named as a possible kidnapper/rapist/vigilante on our school campus...</div>
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While the truth was anything but.</div>
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But the decision to err on the side of caution had to be made in a split second and without pause. </div>
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<b>My fear as an administrator is that I make a wrong decision. </b></div>
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Perhaps I didn't ask the right question of a student with a concern. </div>
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Maybe I didn't give enough caution to a situation and things turned horrible for our students, staff, and community.</div>
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It's even possible that a decision made with the best intentions ended up damaging our school policies and practices. </div>
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S<b>ometimes the decisions are frustrating</b>... and I'm cancelling music for Friday due to the air conditions, even though I truly believe that it would have been okay to have our leadership students bring out the speakers for some fun on a Friday. </div>
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<b>Sometimes the decisions are based on my time limitations.</b>.. and I'm having to send an email at 4:10 pm instead of picking up the phone to connect with a family about a conversation I had with their student.</div>
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<b>Sometimes the decisions allow me to provide a bit of mercy.</b>.. and I give a student a second chance at making a better choice, even though I know they should have made the right one the first time around.</div>
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And <b>sometimes the decisions may just be simple, </b>choosing to extend the dance a half hour to the cheers of four hundred kids.</div>
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Or <b>the decision may be drenched in fears</b> that some rumored harm could come to one of our students if I don't act as swiftly as possible. </div>
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This daily life of an administrator is stuffed with constant decisions that tilt the course of our school community. It's the most challenging part of being a middle school principal: always worried that the decision we made may not have been the best one for our students, our school, and our community. </div>
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But we still have to make the decision. It's the hardest part of our job.</div>
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Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-20498560848003517232018-03-24T17:45:00.000-07:002018-03-24T21:43:06.166-07:00Trust MeOne of the most important elements in the principal-teacher relationship is <b>trust</b>.<br />
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Without trust, there is no collaboration.<br />
Without trust, there is no communication.<br />
Without trust, there is no growth.<br />
Without trust, there is no unity.<br />
Without trust, there is no innovation.<br />
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<b>Trust is arguably the foundation of every relationship, especially so in the realm of education.</b><br />
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It is understandable that a teaching staff may not fully trust a principal who just joined their school. Additionally, the staff may not trust a principal who fails to prove themselves as a loyal, valued member of their school community.<br />
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Likewise, if a school principal is brand new, it is unlikely they'll walk into their school with established relationships of trust with their staff. Also, if they've observed a staff member repeatedly make choices that are of a concerning nature for the students and school community, it can be hard for a principal to depend and trust this staff member.<br />
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But when there is a principal who has chosen to stay a bit longer to help build something special and they're surrounded by a teaching staff who are focused on doing what's best for students, a school community can benefit from a singular focus and vision on improving the school experience for their students. The teaching staff trusts that the principal supports the work that happens every single day in the classroom. The principal trusts that the staff understands the complexities of the millions of daily decisions we may make to keep the school moving forward. There is a mutual trust.<br />
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<b>But trust is hard. </b><br />
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Because we are human and we make mistakes.<br />
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And I shared one such mistake I made at a recent staff collaboration.<br />
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The mistake centered around a sixth month conversation regarding overlapping graduation/promotion dates between our middle school and the local high school district. As the worst luck would have it, somehow our graduation dates landed on the same day: June 7th.<br />
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When I first saw this conflict during the summer, I immediately began to brainstorm possible solutions. Could we move our graduation events a night earlier? Could we add a professional development day in March or May that would push our graduation date one day later? Perhaps the high school district would consider moving their graduation time to a different day? I spent countless hours looking for a solution.<br />
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In working with our local high school, there were conversations where they may have been willing to move their graduation events to the night before. Our sister middle school was exploring the idea to move their graduation to the night before. I was very clear in my resolve to keep our graduation night as close to our scheduled last-day-of-school 6 pm start time as possible.<br />
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In the end, the high school would compromise in moving up their start time for graduation to 4 pm on the shared last day of school and we would move our promotion ceremony an hour later to 7 pm. I felt it was the best outcome of so many bad choices.<br />
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During the six months of reflection and negotiations, I reached out to our Home and School Club parents for input. I spoke regularly with fellow administrators about the predicament we were in. I had brief conversations with various staff members, seeking their advice on the issue.<br />
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But what I didn't do was sit down with our 8th grade teachers.<br />
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After all, our 8th grade teachers are expected to attend graduation and I didn't check in with them to brainstorm solutions beforehand.<br />
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<b>This was my mistake.</b><br />
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And, with the encouragement and support via a reflective conversation with a valued staff member, I realized I needed to make things right during our next staff collaboration.<br />
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And so, later that afternoon, I led a conversation about the decision to keep our promotion ceremonies on the same night. I explained why I didn't want to move graduation to the night before (do the 8th graders come to school the next day? what if they do? what if they do but decide to leave halfway through the day? what culture does it create if kids see other kids cutting school or making bad decisions since they've now graduated?).<br />
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I shared why I didn't want to have graduation earlier in the day (we intentionally moved our graduation dance to immediately follow the graduation to combat a variety of student issues; to have graduation at noon and the party that evening would return to those complicating issues).<br />
<br />
I went over every step I made, reflecting along the way, pointing out secondary issues that may have been created through the best of our intentions. I made the "how" regarding the decision to move graduation an hour later as clear as I could.<br />
<br />
And I apologized to the staff, specifically our 8th grade teachers, that I did not officially sit down with them to discuss the issue and gather their input. Speaking without notes and little rehearsal, I gave an honest recounting of how I wished I would have, even if I was unsure that the final outcome may not have changed.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>I then addressed the issue of trust.</b><br />
<br />
I shared how, as the site principal, I have trust for them as the Union Middle School staff and the work they do with our students every single day in our classrooms.<br />
<br />
I then asked that they have the same level of trust in the decisions I make as the site principal. Trust that I don't make decisions haphazardly. Trust that I'll do my best to do right by our students. Trust that I work extremely hard to support them and their interests.<br />
<br />
I asked them, especially in a moment where they may not agree with me, to trust that I will always make the best possible choice for our students, for our school community, and for them, even when faced with less-than-optimal outcomes.<br />
<br />
I asked for their trust. They have mine. I hope to have theirs as well.<br />
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Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-64032544896017444912018-03-24T17:44:00.005-07:002018-03-24T21:42:39.019-07:00Dress Code Drama<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">A few months ago, our neighboring elementary district made the <a href="https://www.mercurynews.com/2017/09/07/female-student-told-attire-is-distracting-boys/" target="_blank">local news</a> when a student was dress coded twice in the same day. The student's parent took the conversation to Nextdoor, looking to gather input from the local community to better understand the varied viewpoints on the always-debated topic of middle school dress codes. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">What started as a civil conversation on Nextdoor slowly turned into a variety of conflicting opinions. A few individuals posted in support of the student, saying that she should be able to wear whatever she wanted to school. Others posted in support of the school, saying that they had a clear right to establish what students were allowed to wear to school. The other parents and communities stayed within the gates of these two differing opinions for the most part.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">As a local educator with first hand knowledge on the daily drama involving dress code, I jumped into the conversation. My goal was to explain to both sides that our truth needed to be somewhere in between the two extreme viewpoints. I hoped to share insight into what it's like to work at a middle school and how we address these dress code situations on our campus. Below is what I shared:</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i><span style="color: red;">Hi everyone - I'm the Union Middle School principal. I just wanted to share a few thoughts on the dress code talk at schools. Please note that I have two 7 year old daughters and am already challenged with finding shorts for them that are a bit longer.
I also want to preface this post with that I understand if you disagree with me on this topic. I value this conversation and think that there is a lot of merit to all sides of the dress code topic.
Here are my thoughts on the Union Middle School dress code:
1) </span><b style="color: red;">Our school is a place of work for over 100 adults</b><span style="color: red;">. As I shared with the students last week during our assemblies, I'm pretty sure that someone who works at Google doesn't have a 13 year old boy in a "bralette" walking the halls during their work day. I feel that our school staff should be able to come to their workplace and know that they aren't going to have a student in a bikini top or another student with their pants sagging down to mid thigh.
2) Yes, it feels like a lot of dress codes target females. However, as I shared with the students last week, </span><b style="color: red;">we apply the dress code equally</b><span style="color: red;">. If a female student was sagging, showing her undergarmet boxers, we would speak with the student. If a male student had their bra straps showing, we would speak with the student. That said, the current style of clothes does seem to cause more issues with school dress codes on the female side.
3) The "distraction to other opposite gender" excuse is </span><b style="color: red;">completely ridiculous</b><span style="color: red;">. Most boys in middle school aren't even aware of these issues; ditto for the girls. I don't use this "excuse" in our conversations as I think it makes the issue about the student's sexuality, which isn't the topic at hand.
4) When I talk with our students, I come back to the same two words: </span><b style="color: red;">Dress Appropriately.</b><span style="color: red;"> Yes, we have a page of dress code topics (don't wear this, it's ok to wear this, etc) but I always return to these two words: dress appropriately. </span><b><u>To me</u></b><span style="color: red;">, "dressing appropriately" for school means that your undergarments aren't showing and that everything is appropriately covered, male or female.
5) While the students may feel differently, we only dress code situations where there is a severe excess of skin showing. Being blunt, I think that it's not appropriate to see a female/male student's behind from out under their shorts. When something really pushes the boundaries of what's "dressing appropriately", we speak with the student and solve the issue as quietly and innocently as we can. </span><b style="color: red;">We don't want them to be embarrassed</b><span style="color: red;">. As we tell the kids, you bought those shorts a few years ago; You've grown... the shorts haven't.
Again, sorry for joining the conversation here. Lisa F, the Fisher principal, would be glad to discuss any issues about dress code if you have questions for her. She's fantastic and is very welcoming.
And if you have any follow up questions, do feel free to email or PM.
Todd Feinberg</span></i></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i><br /></i></span>
The response was positive. A few community members responded publicly and other privately. One Nextdoor member had a follow question about the words "<b><u>To Me</u></b>" in the 4th segment above. They felt that saying "To Me" put the fate of our entire school in my hands and that I shouldn't make such rules based on my own personal viewpoints.<br />
<br />
I responded, as that's not what I had meant by "To Me" in my original point:<br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><span style="font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">@NextdoorMember - well, I guess I should clarify what "to me" means.
As a school principal, I get to balance the needs of our students with the wants of our parent community while supporting the work our teachers do in and outside of the classroom.
When I say "to me", I could very well say "based on lengthy staff conversations, a thorough review of other middle school dress codes, a constant study of ever-evolving case law, input from both our parents and students through multiple venues (the parents at my school can text me with questions and feedback; I also oversurvey my parent community throughout the year), my own opinions as a parent of four kids (two of which are girls with significant special needs), and the past 17 years working almost exclusively with middle school communities" instead.
But that's way too long and wordy.
It is the expectation of the school principal (among other parties as well) to provide a safe, structured learning environment for all kids, a safe, positive workplace for all employees, and the best inclusive community we can. Some principals do a really good job; others not so much. Fisher is blessed to have Mrs. F - she's great. Count your blessings.
So when I say "to me", I'm including everything that goes into even the most basic of decisions. Doing what's best for kids is what drives us to make our decisions. Not everyone agrees on every decision; but as long as I know we are trying our best to care for all of our kids and giving our staff the best opportunity to work with and support our kids, I feel pretty good about saying "to me".</span></i></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><span style="color: red; font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></i></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">The conversation died down shortly thereafter. The principal at the other middle school held a community meeting to discuss the parent concerns. People moved on to the next story.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">For our own school community, I appreciate the willingness of our parent community to support the work we do at Union Middle. Almost every parent I speak with supports the "dress appropriately" expectation, even if they may disagree with some of the points made above. Their issue often isn't with the dress code itself, but it's the lack of conversation most administrators are willing to have on the topic. Be willing to be honest and meet your parent community halfway. Work together to support your students and what "dress appropriately" looks for your school environment. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helveticaneue" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "roboto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">After all, Spring is coming.</span></span><br />
<br />
<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-77689112552799753582018-03-02T11:54:00.001-08:002018-03-24T21:43:50.242-07:00Reflection of Six Principal Years<br class="Apple-interchange-newline" />
I was <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2018/02/an-inspirational-morning-read.html" target="_blank">recently inspired</a> by <a href="https://twitter.com/casas_jimmy" target="_blank">Jimmy Casas</a>' new book <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Culturize-Every-Student-Whatever-Takes/dp/1946444464" target="_blank">Culturize</a>. His words and shared stories throughout the entire book allowed me to reflect upon the past six years of my own principalship at Union Middle. Mr. Casas had a way to put my goals, my vision, and my hopes onto the printed page.<br />
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As a first year and first time principal, I had what I felt was a very clear vision for what I wanted my time at Union Middle School to look like. However, as a first year and first time principal, I'm not sure how well I was able to communicate these goals to our staff, students, and school community. Given that I viewed some days a success simply based on mere survival, I'm guessing I wasn't able to share my vision as well as I would have like.<br />
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Now however, absent a time machine but with the gift of hindsight and reading Culturize, <b>I'd suggest that the following five goals were the foundation of my original vision on how to improve Union Middle School.</b><br />
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My first goal was to <b>improve our school culture</b>. Union Middle already had a positive school culture, especially compared to some of the schools I've worked at previously. Still, in moving from good to great, there was some work to do. I wanted our teachers to have a stronger voice on building (and rebuilding) the school culture. We introduced a school hashtag (#teamUMS). We held Twitter Bingo contests amongst the staff to showcase the amazing work at UMS. As Mr. Casas notes, the creation and support of a school culture cannot remain on the shoulders alone of the administration; all school educators need to work to build a positive school culture.<br />
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My second goal, intentionally intertwined with my first goal, was a <b>focus on hiring the very best educators</b>. Hiring educators can be a tricky thing. You <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2013/11/a-how-to-build-master-schedule.html" target="_blank">create a master schedule</a> that puts students first with the adults in the best growth opportunity possible. From there, you post the available positions and hope to attract the best candidates possible. Relying on advice from the previous principal, I always tried to find eligible candidates through word of mouth and built in professional friendships to encourage to apply and join our staff. Sometimes, during the early days of August at the very last minute before school starts or perhaps during the middle of the year, you just get lucky with amazing hires who become future linch-pins of your school community. We've been extremely blessed over the past six years to add to our already-talented staff with a positive mix of compassionate educators with passion for their profession and the knowledge to curate curiosity in the classroom.<br />
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The third goal, after adding the very best to our staff, would be to <b>continue to build our teachers into site instructional leaders and district teacher leaders</b> as well. There was a huge push to provide professional development to all staff members. A dozen #teamUMS educators attended an Ed Tech Summit. We brought another dozen to the Fall #CUE event in Napa (it's really Vallejo). Our district office instituted tech leadership opportunities throughout our elementary and middle schools. Some of the most talented, edu-famous educators joined our staff for learning opportunities year round. At our school site, I intentionally would invite different staff members to attend classroom walkthroughs and to join for various professional development opportunities. One teacher mentioned that I hadn't invited them to be on an interview committee yet; they were added to the very next interviewing committee. Just today I shared that an overwhelming majority of our current staff would be one of the most innovative educators at any other school; we just all happen to be working alongside each other as part of the #teamUMS team.<br />
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My fourth goal was personal: <b>stay</b>. I've seen schools suffer through multiple principals over a short few years. Frequent turnover at the administrator level can be a culture killer for a school. There becomes a "well, I'll just outlast this guy like I did the last five" mentality amongst the staff as they cycle through new principal initiatives, expectations, and idiosyncrasies. My expectation was that I'd commit to our school, staff, students, and community for at least five years. I've read that the average administrator lasts around two and a half years at their site. Smile year one, talk change year two, update your resume for year three. That's the cycle. I wanted the school community to know that I was committed to staying put and enjoying our time together as well.<br />
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The fifth and final main goal is a bit different: <b>I want to build a school community where I'm no longer needed</b>. To clarify, I don't want to force myself out of a job (I'm actually quite happy) but instead reach a place where the school is functional and moving forward without the principal's needling or, in some cases, meddling. We've worked hard to clearly establish protocols, expectations, and routines for our school community, all replicable aspects to keep things moving forward in my absence. I've actually even written my "goodbye letter" to my school community, even though I have no intention of leaving any time soon!<br />
<br />
I feel like we've accomplished our made-in-hindsight five year goals. The school culture has drastically improved. It is in no doubt to the most welcome additions to our staff. The staff has made great growth in becoming leaders within the school community. I'm glad that I've stuck around to see it all happen. And yes, we have a school community where there are days where I feel like I'm not needed, as if the entire Union Middle ecosystem is running quite well in my absence.<br />
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This isn't about having to leave, but actually why I want to stay: I've been blessed to be a part of an incredibly wonderful school community over the past eight years and look forward to many, many more as a member of the #teamUMS community.<br />
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Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-75739809689975649822018-02-09T10:50:00.001-08:002018-03-24T21:48:08.696-07:00An Inspirational Morning ReadI'm in the middle of reading a book. It's called <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Culturize-Every-Student-Whatever-Takes/dp/1946444464" target="_blank">Culturize</a> and it's by the amazing <a href="https://twitter.com/casas_jimmy" target="_blank">Jimmy Casas</a>.<br />
<br />
In our odd world within education, there are a few uber "edu-famous" individuals and I'd suggest that Mr. Casas is part of this elite group. His kid-first, student-always mantra coupled with his poignant words and relatable stories provide a middle-of-February educator with reminders why we're in education: our students and doing whatever we can to enable their success.<br />
<br />
I purchased two copies of Culturize for our staff upon its immediate availability via Amazon. I placed the books on our Staff Reading Shelf and went along my way.<br />
<br />
Within a few days, I received an email from a staff member. They shared their appreciation for making the book available, informed me that they were already read the first two chapters, and even included a few compliments about my own "principal-style" and how it overlaps with some of the suggestions shared in the book. They also said that if I hadn't read the book yet, I should.<br />
<br />
There's one thing true about almost every educator in February: our "to-read" book list is at least twelve deep. Bumping a book to the top of the list and actually balancing some reading time in between all of the demands of our day is a challenge. Still, when a staff member says "you'd like this book," you drop everything and pick it up.<br />
<br />
Today, I arrived a bit earlier than usual to work with the intention to catch up on emails, write a few evaluations, add items to the school calendar, and everything else we hope to do in the hours before our students and staff arrive. That was the plan.<br />
<br />
When I arrived to my office, I saw the book outside my office. I had purchased a third copy and realized that I now had an hour of quiet to read a few chapters. I'm glad I did.<br />
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It's a really good book. To quote the aforementioned staff member, "It's a lot of good stuff in the same place. Very accessible. I don't have to read a teacher book and an admin book to get it." They're right. It's a book that speaks to every educator, no matter your role.<br />
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The book focuses upon the four core principles of a positive school culture:<br />
<br />
We must expect all staff to <b>champion for all students.</b> It sounds so simple and yet saying these words out loud inspire me to rethink how I judge a certain grade of students ("they seem to just lack initiative") or perhaps a certain class ("I'm struggling on how to best support this class - they seem to want me to do everything for them") or even a specific student ("I feel like we've tried everything - what more can we do?). The book encourages us to recognize what our students are doing well instead of focusing on what they aren't and to refocus on the relationship piece of the school adult-student dynamic. It's a good February reminder, especially during the influx of senior/eighth grade-itis.<br />
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Every staff member must <b>expect excellence </b>of one another and, most importantly, of their students. Beautiful words. It's not just the responsibility of a principal, a counselor, a front office administrative assistant, a math teacher, a after school sport coach; collectively, we are all part of the team that demands professionalism as a school community member. It is important to expect our students to try their best and be the support in place to help them reach the level of excellence. Excellence is an expectation for the entire school community; we all hold the responsibility to uphold it.<br />
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All staff members must <b>carry the banner</b> for their school in a positive light at all times. Admittedly, this can be challenging. There will be times where you'll be upset with an administrator, an educator, a student, a parent, and most likely even yourself. As Jimmy Casas shares, great change begins with self-change. How an educator perceives their school is clearly shared, often unintentionally, in how they collaborate, how they speak to and about students, and their body language. At a previous school, on my very first day, I could tell which teacher was going to be a challenge to work with: they were instantly combative, they spoke negatively about students, and deflected every idea with their own stamp of negativity. They did not believe in the success of their students and not of the school either. When that staff member retired, it was if a dark cloud hovering over the staff has dissipated. Imagine what could have been different for that individual and all of their students over the years if they had chosen to share a more positive light for their school.<br />
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Every educator, administrator, and support staff member must strive to <b>be a merchant of hope</b>. I've found it's significantly harder to expect less from a student when I know their story. If I know a student has a less-than-perfect home life, I don't accept the missing homework under that umbrella of an excuse. Instead, our staff works to find ways to support the student at school to complete the homework. We've created extra small group tutorials after school, built electives where kids can be kids, and celebrated the little successes along the way. Most of all, we've worked hard on building a school community and culture where we get to know our students and celebrate them just for being who they are.<br />
<br />
Jimmy Casas simplifies his overall message with the following words: <b>every child deserves the opportunity to be a part of something great</b>.<br />
<br />
And he's right.<br />
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As an educator, it's our job to build something great for our students and each other. A place where we support kids relentlessly, where we expect greatness from one another and our students, where we highlight the amazing work on our campus, and where we never give up on any single student. A place where we provide our students a chance to explore their passions, to be part of something great.<br />
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Highly recommend the book. Enjoy your day. Make it special.<br />
<br />
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-48308261286182900602018-01-19T20:41:00.002-08:002018-03-24T21:44:10.514-07:00The Stolen Milkshake<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 12.8px;">One of the best things about not living too close to where I spend most of my days is the privacy that I'm allowed on the weekend to walk the neighborhood in my pajamas, venture out to eat with my family without worries, and given a bit of separation from "the job" of being a middle school principal at all hours of the day.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">When I worked at the local high school in my neighborhood, it was not uncommon to be stopped on my walks by parents seeking school advice. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">I distinctly recall one dinner my wife and I had at a local restaurant where the family sitting next to us spent their entire dinner complaining about the job the administrators were doing at the local high school. I sat there as quiet as I could possibly be for the first thirty minutes, listening to everything these administrators were doing wrong. Sadly, I was one of the administrators they were talking about and in their defense, they weren't wrong about everything. Eventually, I did speak up and introduce myself, offer to answer any questions, and tell them how delightful their student was. The next fifteen minutes of silence from their table was both awkward and incredibly wonderful.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">There was one time where a parent, who would go on to receive a restraining order from one of our teachers, discovered where I lived and showed up on a Saturday to ask for help with his twin sons. Yes, a Saturday. At my front door. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">These were not the best of days.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">Fast forward a few years and now I oddly miss it. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">I commute approximately twenty five minutes to work each morning. Thus, it is quite rare that I see a Union Middle School family at my local Palo Alto hangouts. Yes, one student was outside my house once but they were just as awkwardly unexpected to see me as I was them. I've occasionally run into a student at the Oakland Zoo or perhaps Stanford Shopping Center. For the most part, however, I have a clear division between my work and home lives.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">And yes, despite the horrible experiences from years past, I do miss occasionally seeing students and their families in a non-school setting. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">The best part of seeing a student outside of school is the frozen response we educators get. The student will become statuesque, barely able to turn their head to their parent and speak the words, "mom... Mr. Feinberg is here... right there... buying six bananas... what is happening?"</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">They're absolutely adorable. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">I use these moments to introduce myself, offer a few positive words about the student to their parent, say something silly to unfreeze the moment, and go on my way. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">And sometimes... there are rare opportunities where we get to have a little fun with our students and be as silly as they are when we adults are not around. These moments turn into some of my favorite stories.</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">For example...</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 12.8px;">A week ago, I was grabbing a quick dinner at the hamburger place down the block from Union Middle. The assistant principal and I were to attend a Home and School Club meeting that night, and so after our meetings and before the next scheduled event, we had a scant forty five minutes to grab a bite and return to school.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">While at dinner, two brothers, an 8th and a 6th grader, walked into the restaurant. </span></span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">I saw them ordering shakes and asked if they were getting me one too.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"> They smiled back and said "of course we are! It will be ready and just a bit!"</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">He was smiling - obviously I knew he was kidding - and so I replied that I would wait for as long as it took. I thanked him profusely for buying me a milkshake. What a great kid! </span><br />
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The two students were both laughing. <span class="il">The 8th grader</span> informed me that he had purchased me a cookies and cream shake and that I just had to wait. I was pretty excited to see how this was all going to play out.</div>
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The person working the milkshake counter soon called the student's name so I went up and got the shake. I sat down with the milkshake, again thanking <span class="il">the student</span> profusely for the present. <span class="il">The student, somewhat confused why I had just picked up his shake order, calmly</span> walked over, chuckling a bit, and said “uh, I got you a different shake; that one is mine.” “Oh,” I replied, “you must have got me a large shake instead! Thank you so much!”</div>
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The boys were sitting a few tables away so I kept checking in with them about my shake. <span class="il">The 8th grade student</span> encouraged me to wait. He was sure it was coming up. When they were making a new shake, he said, “oh, that might be it!” </div>
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So at this point, knowing I had to leave for the night's Home and School Club meeting, I was either going to walk away or instead take the joke to the next level. <b>I chose, as any middle school principal would, the next level and used my phone to order a shake online for me.</b></div>
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Now keep in mind that I didn't want a shake. The last thing I needed in the world at that point was a five dollar cookies and cream milkshake. Regardless, the milkshake was ordered as subtly as I could via my phone, slightly under the table and away from the students' prying eyes.</div>
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It was the best $5 I'd ever spent.</div>
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My milkshake was ready in just a few minutes and I went up to the counter to get it. I had a former student who just happened to be working at the restaurant that night to announce “milkshake for Mr. Feinberg from (student's name)” over the speaker. I collected the milkshake and then went over to <span class="il">the students</span> and thanked them over and over again. </div>
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The look on the students' face was awesome. It was a mix of “what is going on here?” and “wait, I didn’t get you a milkshake” to “oh no, Mr. Feinberg just stole somebody’s shake!” </div>
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At this point, we did a selfie (because that's what we do in middle school!) and after many more thanks for the shake, I left with my milkshake. As I was leaving, I could seem them a bit stunned, half expecting someone to tackle me and reclaim the milkshake I had walked away with.</div>
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I wrote the students' parents that night, just sharing the story. Both parents wrote me back with wonderful and kind emails.They shared that their sons had called them immediately after I left with the "stolen" milkshake and again shared the story when they got home that night, laughing throughout the entire retelling.</div>
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And that's what I miss. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Large Cookies & Cream Milkshake. I ate all of it.</td></tr>
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Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8520539927443355228.post-24124069141676685652017-12-26T20:29:00.002-08:002018-03-24T21:47:28.343-07:00Molly and Her BikeAs <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2014/10/a-long-road-to-travel-often-alone-but.html" target="_blank">shared previously</a>, my wife and I adopted twin girls from Russia in the Fall of 2011. We were told by multiple doctors, both in Russia and via Skype, that while the girls were a good bit behind having been institutionalized in an orphanage for 16 months, they would surely catch up to their peers in three, maybe four, definitely no more than five years down the road.<br />
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My wife and I, blinded by our future daughters' adorable faces coupled with our own strong desire to build a family, ignored the obvious signs and moved ahead with the adoption process. Little did we know that our adoption agency would be investigated a few years later <a href="http://www.cleveland.com/court-justice/index.ssf/2017/02/fbi_raids_strongsville-based_i.html" target="_blank">by the FBI</a> and eventually close their doors after <a href="https://clevelandmagazine.com/in-the-cle/the-read/articles/families-in-crisis-when-foreign-adoption-goes-wrong" target="_blank">similar investigative pieces</a> about their adoption practices. It turns out that the adoption agency we trusted may have been withholding medical information regarding our daughters. Looking back, we are stunned we didn't see all of the signs.<br />
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Neither Molly or Kenna could crawl when we brought them home. Molly eventually started to move a bit better but her words were increasingly delayed. Kenna didn't fully walk until closer to age three, and even then with an uneasy balance. My wife and I would spend our evenings sitting across from one another, feet to feet, teaching Kenna how to walk and balance back from mommy to daddy.<br />
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Doctor visits turned into multiple diagnoses which turned into multiple therapy appointments which turned into my wife a shuttle service for no less than six weekly appointments for the girls. When you add in our attempts to include them in gymnastics (they were the five year olds in the two to three year old class, often at the back of the line, working one to one with an instructor) as well as every service we could squeeze out of our <a href="http://principaldays.blogspot.com/2016/09/part-2-parent-of-2-special-education_20.html" target="_blank">somewhat stingy school district</a>, the care that Molly and Kenna necessitated became a full time job for my wife.<br />
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Sometimes, they give the look of what most people would call "normal kids". They smile and laugh, try their best to make friends, and often ask questions that are age-appropriate. They also act like "normal kids" when they have nuclear meltdown tantrums in the chips aisle of Target because their father refuses to buy them their own individual Goldfish packages. (Dad gave in after a few minutes; the screaming stopped thereafter. I tried my best.)<br />
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But often, it is very clear that something is different with my Molly and Kenna to the casual observer. They stare a bit longer. They yell out at inappropriate times and for no reason. Their speech still struggles along. Letters and numbers seem to be their enemy.<br />
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And worse, due to just diagnosed sensory issues, they'll scream at any loud sound, such as a motorcycle's engine, and often run anyway to get away from the noise, even into oncoming traffic.<br />
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Due to a lack of social cues, they'll often hit when angry, especially if one of their siblings has taken something that they were playing with within the last 48 hours but hadn't touched in the interim.<br />
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With the severe attachment issues they have with my wife, our time spent together as a six person family often ends in tears, anger, and frustration for everyone.<br />
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My wife and I have come to understand that they may never live on their own, they may never be able to have sustainable jobs in the workplace, and that they may never be able to do just the normal things that all kids get to do... like ride a bike.<br />
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This is hard.<br />
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We want our kids to be successful, no matter what the level they can rise up to. We want to take away societal limits that falsely prevent our kids from reaching their true potential. My wife and I are both educators, both with a soft spot for the autistic, the needy, the lost. As parents of two very special needs kids, it is a challenge to accurately predict where they'll end up and how to best get them to where they need to be for a sustainable life, whatever that looks like.<br />
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Back to the bikes.<br />
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Molly and Kenna have been asking for new bikes for over a year now. We previously had some pink princess bikes bought off Amazon, put together imperfectly by moi, and eventually discarded without the approval of my daughters. The bikes just weren't safe, even with their lopsided training wheels. Molly and Kenna would often fall, often due to their inability to control their bike. Time after time, they would end up in tears after a horrible bike riding experience.<br />
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As a parent, I had given up on them ever riding a bicycle. Given their physical, intellectual, and sensory needs, it would just be something they could never do.<br />
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Regardless, with Christmas upcoming, Molly and Kenna had different ideas. Whenever they would get asked what they wanted from Santa, it was the same answer, every single time: We Want A Bike.<br />
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Knowing how Bike Riding went the first time, I had little desire to repeat the experience. I knew that it was just something they couldn't do.<br />
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Fast forward to the morning of December 24th and the question being asked one more time to Molly and Kenna. Their answer was the same. My wife looked at me and said, "we're going to have to go get them some bikes."<br />
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That morning, with the help of my father in law, the girls went to the local bike store and tested out a few bikes. Nothing was purchased until I returned later that afternoon to pick up their new bikes. Kenna was getting a semi smaller bike with training wheels. Molly, however, was getting a larger bike without training wheels.<br />
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Two thoughts at this time: (1) This doesn't make any sense; she needs training wheels, and (2) This isn't going to end well; prepare for doom.<br />
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The bikes were the last gifts of Christmas morning. The girls were thrilled. Immediately following the family breakfast, they wanted to go bike riding. I was chosen by my wife to be the one to take them. I did not get a vote.<br />
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We walked across the street to the park. I had a firm hand on both bikes and girls, not wanting the upcoming chaos to start too soon. We walked a half block to our starting point of the park's biking loop. Helmets were on. Girls got on their bikes. Dad was ready for kid tears. And then this happened.<br />
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Day 1 with a bike</div>
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No words.</div>
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I called my wife. MOLLY IS RIDING HER BIKE! SHE DOESN'T HAVE ANY TRAINING WHEELS! </div>
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My wife calmly said, "yes, Todd, as I told you, my brother said she didn't need training wheels and would be fine."</div>
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BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO RIDE A BIKE, I screamed back.</div>
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"Well, from the video you just sent me, it looks like she does," responded my wife.</div>
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And Molly did.</div>
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She rode around the park no less than 30 times, never falling once. She learned how to use the hand brake. She somehow figured out how to make tight turns. She slows down when she's approaching someone in the path ahead of her. It didn't make any sense to me at the time (and it still doesn't), but Molly somehow eclipsed my predictions of her potential.</div>
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Molly and Kenna rode to the library, all the way down Newell to Channing, across Channing to the other park, around that biking loop (with a hill, no less) so many times, and then back home. This was just the first biking experience of the day. We went out later Christmas afternoon as well and then again twice today. It's safe to say that tomorrow will be filled with biking opportunities as well.</div>
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I'm now wondering what other limits I've placed on my daughters that are holding them back rather than letting them soar. Maybe they are ready for the Stanford Dish. Maybe they can take on a few leadership roles (ie chores) in the household. Maybe they are capable of so much more than what I thought.</div>
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Maybe all of our students are capable of so much more than we think.</div>
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From Day 2 - Notice the "feet trick" Molly does</div>
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Happy holidays, everyone. Here's to another 12 days of nonstop bike riding!</div>
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<br />Todd Feinberghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03755700158179082729noreply@blogger.com3